Breaking Dark Dawn
by Tprinces
Summary: Sequel to ECLIPSING ECLIPSE. Here it is. The show stopper. The one you've all been waiting for. Dreams are shattered. Lives are lost. Worlds collide. Hamburgers are eaten. This is the rewrite of Breaking Dawn.
1. My Life is Average

All right. Here it is. The one we've all been waiting for. I PROMISE to keep as current as I possibly can with this one. (but keep in mind that I _am_ going to England this week for three months) This is the story I've been dying to redo for years. And I'm sure, it's the story you've been dying to see redone.

If you've been with me all the way through, thank you! It's been fun! If you're new, it's important to note: **if you haven't read the first three rewrites, you will be confused. This is not a rewrite that takes place after the real **_**Eclipse. **_Anywho... Also, it's important to note that **this is a rewrite. Therefore, it will **_**not**_** have that fairytale ending. In fact, it's going to be rather dark.** Just to forewarn you guys.

Now that that's all out of the way, let's get down to business.

**BREAKING DARK DAWN**

**One: My Life is Average**

**I**t was Friday. Bella's favorite day of the week. The one she looked forward to every night she went to bed. Her eyes stared at the clock on her classroom wall, her jittery leg bouncing up and down. Why couldn't the day be over all ready? Indeed, the daytime hours moved unusually slow today. Dragging on with unnecessary sludge just to irritate her. But she held strong. It would be night time soon. Her eyes switched from staring at the clock to glaring at the window beside her. The one day of the week Seattle decided not to be cloudy or rain, and it just _had_ to be Friday. Why? Oh_ why_? Taking a breath, she turned her eyes back around to the teacher in the front of the room. Professor Crawford, a wrinkly fellow with a quick tongue and dull eyes, was writing on the white board all the different methods of metaphors and similes. Normally, Bella wasn't such an unfocused student in college. But dammit, it was Friday. This was her excuse day. This was the day that Edward, her boyfriend of almost four years now, came to visit from Forks, and stay through the whole weekend.

Bella had moved after graduation to a small apartment her father helped her get that was close to North Seattle Community College. It wasn't exactly her dream school, but the financial aid was nice there, and she could focus on getting her general education out of the way before heading off to a university. Of course, the one she _did _want to get into cost well over thirty five thousand dollars a year, and was in California. So though she applied for a fall transfer, she didn't expect to get in. It was a mere flight of fancy that she toyed with every now and again. She would probably wind up going to Washington State or something along those lines. In any case, there she was, in class, waiting for the sun to go down so that her boyfriend could safely travel between Forks to Seattle to see her. She nibbled at her nails, staring at her own faint reflection in the window. Though her father thought she had, Bella didn't think she grew all too much after graduating. Her hair was still a frizzy mess, and she was still a tall, knobby, pale twig in jeans and worn out sneakers. She huffed to herself, pushing up a small strand of hair from her face. Turning back around, she saw with joy that the class was almost out. The faster class got out, the faster the sun went down, and the faster Edward arrived at her doorstep. Or rather, window sill.

Because yes, Edward was a vampire.

It was odd just how normal this was for Bella. Not to say that her life had been one long, boring routine with him. Not even close to one. After getting together with Edward, Bella's life was in danger countless lives, some of those encounters even _before_ they hooked up. She'd been kidnapped (many times), threatened, abused, nearly killed, enslaved and so on. Perhaps any normal person would have gotten out and gotten out fast. But Bella just supposed that she was a horse of a different color. Or that she was certifiably insane. Either one could be a likely option. For as many bad times she'd encountered with Edward, there were those good times. Those fantastic times. Those times that made her think she was dreaming. Not to mention the sex was phenomenal. Despite his anti-social nature at first, Edward turned out to be rather romantic in the years that followed their first two. Especially after she moved. He brought her flowers, read her old books, sometimes even let her head lay in his lap and did nothing but pet her hair. It seemed as though the distance made their relationship all the sweeter.

When the class finally did wrap up, Bella shot to her feet, grabbed her bag, and practically sprinted out of the room. A few people said goodbye to her as she headed towards the parking lot for students. She had made a few friendly acquaintances, but spent most of her time at school on her own. It wasn't like high school, where she saw and sat by the same people for each class. But it didn't bother her as much. Getting into her truck, she tossed her bag to the side and pulled out, humming and drumming her hands on the steering wheel. Finally, she'd have her Friday.

Her cellphone buzzed inside her pants pocket. Frowning, she stopped at the light ahead of her and answered. "Hello?"

"_Hey, Bella. We're short staffed tonight. Think you could come in?_"

Bella felt her stomach twist with disappointment. "Oh come on, Scott! You know the weekends are my days!" As she turned onto a different street, she heard her manager sigh.

"_Yeah, yeah, I know. But two people already called in sick. And Steph isn't back from her vacation yet._"

Bella rubbed her forehead before turning onto a different street. "Ok... Ok, fine. I'll come in. Just let me go home to change first."

"_Sure thing. Oh man, you're a life saver._"

After hanging up, Bella swore under her breath and continued on her way. Well so much for cleaning up before he got there. Pulling into her garage, she stormed to the lobby door of her apartment building before glaring up at the sunny sky. "This is all your fault," she pouted before going inside. Normally, Edward would come between three and five, after class got out for the week. The sun made sure that this wasn't happening today. Sucking on her teeth, she went up in the elevator and got to her apartment. The building wasn't all that impressive. Just a few floors of boxed living spaces that sat beside an independent book store. The walls crumbled slightly, and the light fixtures often needed replacing and maintenance. But it was what she could afford. She tossed her keys aside and went to her room where her uniform hung. After dressing, she glanced at herself in the mirror. Black apron, black baseball cap, white pants and a white shirt with a black jacket. Bella often wondered why anyone would want ice cream in such a cold place like Seattle, but it paid her bills. Before leaving, she went to her cluttered kitchen table and swiped a piece of paper and a pen from the spew around her. Scribbling down a note, it read:

_Edward_

_I'm sorry, I got called into work. _

_Pick me up at 11 when my shift ends? _

_Love, Bella_

Satisfied with it, she opened her dingy window and taped it to the front of the glass before closing it. Thankfully, the wind wasn't too strong, but just in case, she put extra tape around the corners to keep it from blowing away. Then, she grabbed her house keys and left the apartment, making her way down the street to the ice cream shop. She never needed to drive there – it was only a block away. The shop itself was a tiny little thing, smack dab in the middle of two other buildings that practically squeezed it close together. The familiar smell of waffle cones hit her immediately, and she smiled. Despite her irritation about being called in on a Friday, it was always nice to come in to that smell. She tossed her jacket into the break room before clocking in and grabbing an inventory clip board.

For the rest of the night, Bella was either behind the counter or taking stock in the back freezer. Mostly, she leaned against the work counter, staring at the ice cream cone clock in waiting. She watched as that little cherry swung back and forth beneath it, ticking away each second that she was there. Outside, the sun slowly went down, darkening the world around her. The windows taunted poor Bella, rubbing it in that she couldn't be home to wait for him. Finally, around ten thirty, when the end of her shift drew near, she was cleaning the work table when Scott alerted her.

"I think we might be out of peanut butter chips. Go check."

With a nod, Bella put the rag aside and headed back into the storage room. It was kept highly refrigerated to make sure nothing melted or got bad quickly. So, Bella grabbed her coat before heading in. Blowing through her lips, she checked each labeled box before coming to peanut butter chips. Opening it, she saw a few kiss-shaped toppings left, but for the most part, an empty box. Nodding, she made a mark on her clipboard and was about to leave, when she felt something rush by her. The first few times that this happened, Bella was caught off guard, and even a little scared. But now, all this scare tactic did was put a smile on her face. She turned around and grinned at the rest of the empty freezer. She looked up and down, but couldn't find anything. That's when she noticed that there was a significant amount of space between the shelf and the wall to her right. Biting her lip to keep her from smiling _too _much, Bella snuck over and then pulled out a box of Oreo crumbles. Edward's upside down head grinned at her, his hair sticking straight down as he kept himself on the wall. Bella giggled as he flashed his fangs, gold eyes twinkling in the florescent lighting above.

"You creeper. Get out of there." Despite this, she continued laughing as Edward scuttled out from behind the shelf, much like a crab would. Once he had the room to, Edward flopped to his feet and brought her into his cool arms. They embraced and kissed, Bella feeling her disappointment from earlier wash away into nothingness. When they finally did break apart, Edward gave a playful snap of his teeth, their noses pushed up together.

"Hi, beautiful," he cooed, hands on her hips. "How much longer till you get out?"

"About a half hour. You can wait until then."

"Well... I _guess_ if I _have_ to." He jumped back a bit as Bella pinched him, the two laughing with each other.

"It's not like I want to be here, Edward. Now quit it." Standing on her tip toes, they kissed again before Bella backed away. "Just hang out in here until I clock out. Then we'll head home."

"All right..." He brought her in closer for them to have yet another kiss, before the door swung open behind her. Bella spun around to see Scott standing there with a frown on his face. He was a few years older than Bella, with dark hair that he kept in a pony tail behind his neck. Two large plugs sat in each ear, a couple silver piercings around his lips and nose.

"Hey... you're taking a while. Are you ok?" His frown deepened. "You're not on your phone, are you? I heard you talking..."

Bella, now standing alone, smiled and put her hands in her coat pockets. "No, my phone's in the break room. I just got distracted, that's all. We're out of peanut butter chips."

Scott nodded. "We'll get some by tomorrow. Now come on back out and finish up."

"Right." After Scott left, Bella looked up to see Edward clinging to the ceiling. Deciding to play with him while he was up there, Bella undid the top button of her shirt and gave her rump a little shake. His eyes sparked with mischief and he licked his lips hungrily.

"No fair," he whispered. Bella laughed a bit before leaving the freezer, and letting Edward to his thoughts for now.

Finally, after a long and tiresome day, Bella clocked out, and met Edward outside. He probably rushed out when no one was looking. Not that they could see him when he went at such speeds. Skipping happily towards him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and the two kissed yet again. When they broke, Edward took her hand and they began down the side of the road. "Did you eat?" he asked.

"Didn't have time to. But I snacked a bit in the break room."

"Ah. So I'll be taking you to dinner then."

Bella laughed. "Edward, I'm still in my work clothes. Besides, it's really late." But Edward didn't hear of it, and turned them down to where a little hamburger diner sat. Once she smelled the food it served, Bella felt how hungry she really was. They took a corner table and Bella ordered a house special with french fies and a chocolate shake. It made her insides curl up just thinking about it. Bella leaned into Edward as they watched the grill through the kitchen window. The restaurant itself was a slim, long building, with tables near the windows, and a counter right in front of the blocked off kitchen. An order window sat between the grill and the cashier. With a loud yawn, Bella snuggled into Edward's cool neck. He pet her hair.

"Tired?" he asked softly.

"Just a little. But I can last tonight."

She felt his fingertip brush along her brow as he kissed her forehead. "We have tomorrow and Sunday, too. I don't want you over exerting yourself because of me."

"I know my limits."

"Uh-huh. Is that why I'm seeing this?" He gently prodded a bag beneath her eye. For the first time that night, he frowned. "You're working too hard, Bella. I don't like it."

"Oh my life isn't that hard." She laughed it off, touched by his concern. "It's not like I'm in a sweatshop, Edward. I'm keeping up with my bills and doing well in classes... I couldn't do that if I just slept all day like you." She poked his ribs just before her number was called. Now famished, she rushed to the counter, took her food and shake, before heading back to her table. Edward looped his arm around her waist as she ate.

"You know you don't have to live like this," he said, rubbing her thigh. "If you'd just let my family – "

"Edward, I already told you. Carlisle is _not_ going to pay my way through life. I need to learn how to be independent." Squirting ketchup on her meat patty, she plastered the bun back on before taking a huge bite out of the sandwich. It was like heaven to her empty innards.

Edward removed his hand only to prop his chin on the table, watching her eat. "We don't need money, Bella. I keep telling you this. It's not like we have to go to the grocery store every week."

"Well, you know that saying about teaching a man to fish, right?" Bella nodded before slurping down her thick, chocolate milk shake. "We're not going to be together forever, so I need to be able to function after we do go our separate ways."

Even though this was a subject that had been brought up before, Bella couldn't help but feel a tad depressed at that. They both decided early on that this could only last for so long. After a while, Bella would need to find someone more suitable for her. A _human_ lover. It was a sensible solution to have someone who she could really grow with. Still, it made her sad to think about it. Resting her burger down a bit, she stared at it, her happiness dwindling, if only for a moment. Then, she felt Edward's cold hand take her own. Her eyes snapped up as he kissed the rim of her knuckles.

"You're right," he said sweetly. "You're absolutely right, Bella." He ran his thumb against her fingers, making her smile. "It's just... you're so independent all ready. I guess I feel useless."

"You're not useless." Putting the hamburger aside, she curled into his arms, hugging his neck tightly. "My life would be so different if you weren't in it. I love these weekends together." She kissed his cheek.

Edward let out a little sigh before running his fingers through her fuzzy hair. "Eat your hamburger," he said with a smile. They kissed one last time before Bella turned back to her food, and happily devoured every single morsel on her plate.

That night, Bella wanted to make love, but she could barely keep her eyes open. So Edward vehemently refused, and instead, the two curled up in bed to do nothing but coddle until she fell asleep.

So there we are! Chapter 1! Don't forget to say hello in the review section!

~T.


	2. To Whom it May Concern

All righty then. Here's the new schedule. I'll probably be updating every Monday afternoon, which'll be Monday morning for you guys. I started this this past Monday but then I needed to settle in here, and get acquainted with everything. So sorry this wasn't in on time, but hey.

Also, for those of you who had concerns about keeping certain... _cannon _plot points in the story, let me just say now – there are some things that will remain in tact. However, they will be done in such a way that is different and actually pushes the plot. But it won't be called "Renesmee," that's for damn sure.

**Two: To Whom it May Concern**

**W**aking up on the weekends was always interesting for Bella. Early on, she had bought UV proof shades to go over her windows for Edward. So waking up on Saturdays and Sundays always made her feel like it was still night time, as she always did so in almost complete darkness. Yawning, she rolled over and saw Edward slumbering beside her. While she was huddled in a cocoon of blankets, he was laying with only his pants on, one arm laying over her. Bella shifted and kissed his rigid brow. His face twitched, but did nothing else. He always looked so innocent while he slept. Without any context, one might actually confuse him for something other than a blood sucking, un-dead demon. Bella laid there for a while longer, petting his hair and watching as his eyes moved beneath his lids. After a while, however, she found herself getting hungry, and reluctantly got up to head to the kitchen. Well, kitchen area anyway. For it to be a whole kitchen, it would need... to be a whole kitchen. But Bella never minded her tiny little apartment. It was comforting and pleasant, if not somewhat lonely from time to time. But the weekends fixed that. Bella made herself a bit of coffee and some toast, before brushing her hair, changing, and then heading out to grab the mail.

It was a chilly morning today. She noticed this as she bundled her jacket close to her while shuffling to the building's mailbox downstairs. She said hello to a few passerbys, namely the old woman in 402 and the father and little girl from 315 as they went on their walk for the morning. Taking out her key, Bella grabbed her mail and then started heading upstairs. As she walked, she flipped through a few bills, a catalog, a credit card offer and finally –

"Morning."

Bella jumped just as she got to her door, unaware that Edward was waiting at it for her. He smiled as she tried to regain herself, embarrassed for still not being used to his sudden appearances all the way yet. With a little shove to his shoulder, Bella walked in and set the mail aside without going through the rest. Her arms linked around his cool neck and his hands rested on her hips. "Quit doing that," she said, prodding his cheek with her finger.

"Why? It's so much fun." She laughed just as he bent down to kiss her. They embraced for a little longer before Bella kicked her front door closed, smiling against his lips as it locked automatically. When they broke apart, Bella could feel a little heat beneath his skin, and her smile grew. Without a word, she took his hands, turned them around, and began to drag him to her bedroom. Laughing and giggling all the way there, they flopped onto the sheets and started to make up for lost time.

There was a general belief that the further one gets into a relationship, the more it loses its flame. This couldn't be farther from the truth for Edward and Bella. While they made love beneath Bella's sheets, a thought couldn't help circulating within the back of her head about how it seemed to get better with each new day for them. They've had plenty of rough patches, yes. Lord, more than Bella would like to think about. But after graduation, things couldn't be any smoother. Perhaps a bit too smooth, but she didn't like to think on those terms. Thankfully, Bella had found an apartment with thick walls so as not to disturb the neighbors as they rolled about with each other. If they hadn't, Bella might be homeless right about now. Finally, after what seemed like a good hour (in reality, it was twenty or thirty minutes), the two laid together for even longer, muttering cheesy, gushy lines between each other. They wound up having little sporadic bursts of lust, but around lunch time, Bella was finally permitted to leave the bed in order to eat something. Edward followed her, wearing only his trousers, as she bundled up in a robe. Another thing she did for Edward – she kept the apartment a little on the chilly side so that he wouldn't over heat. All of these things she did without asking, of course. Had she brought it up, he might insist that she didn't need to go to such measures, and that he was perfectly fine handling 72º heat.

Edward hovered over her as she made herself a sandwich, Bella's eyes constantly shifting over her shoulder at him. "Pardon," she said, prodding his stomach. He moved to allow her to sit at her little kitchen island, but kissed her neck and shoulders while she ate. Bella erupted into giggles, her mouth attached to her peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "Will you quit that?" she said, only partly meaning it. She sent a soft elbow to his ribs, but he didn't seem to get the message.

"Quit what?" he teased, hands on Bella's stomach. She laughed again.

"Seriously. I can't do anything when you're distracting me like this.

"That's the general idea." Edward held up a finger as though to make a proclamation. "I will _not_ be neglected!"

Bella snorted. "You're not neglected, you over dramatic swine." Reaching up, she tweaked his nose before noticing something on top of her mail pile. Suddenly, her heart did a backflip as she set her sandwich down. Edward noticed this and looked over as well. He blinked, reading the return address.

"Isn't that the school you applied to?"

Wordlessly, Bella nodded. Reaching forward with timid hands, Bella took the envelope in her fingers. It was a response. This envelope would determine whether or not she was good enough for her dream school. Her hands suddenly began to shake and she put it onto her lap, staring at her sandwich. Edward blinked. "Aren't you going to open it?" She shook her head, causing him to frown. "What? Why not?"

"Because... it can only be one of two things." She put her hand on her forehead, staring at the envelope. "I didn't get in because I'm not good enough, or I did get in but can't go because I'm not rich enough." She closed her eyes, trying to calm her own curiosity. Edward sat beside her, staring at it.

"But don't you want to see?" She turned her eyes to him. "I mean... Maybe you can get a scholarship? Come on, Bella... isn't this your dream school?" She nodded. "Then open it. Go on."

Bella remained still, staring at the plastic and paper sleeve that held her results. Taking a breath, she slid her finger in the fold of the envelope and carefully split the seal. Her throat had a lump in it as she pulled out the folded paper inside. Now she was really shaking. Heart pounding and mouth dry, she unfolded the paper and stared at its contents.

_Isabella Swan_

_Congratulations! We are pleased to inform you that you have been successfully accepted into the _  
_California School for Arts and Sciences. We are always pleased to add new students, and we hope _  
_that your successes will be aided by our eager staff and faculties._

_We expect you for orientation this August the 10th at 9:30am in the Windle Lecture Hall, and _  
_have a toll free number on our website that can be called at any time for any questions or _  
_inquiries. Fall semester starts September 1st. We look forward to seeing you!_

_Sincerely,_

_John S. Bradly_

_CSAS Dean._

For the first ten or twenty minutes, Bella couldn't speak. She just sat there, staring, forgetting to breathe and unable to understand what she read. But then, it all started to click. She got in. She _got in!_ Bella applied and was deemed good enough to get in to the school that she wanted! She couldn't help herself. Standing, she gave a shout, her eyes bright and shimmering with happiness. Turning right around, she jumped onto Edward and squeezed him tight, laughing and whooping in the air. Edward laughed just as brightly, hugging her around her waist and spinning in the kitchen. They celebrated with kisses, laughs and more kisses.

"I knew it!" said Edward. "I knew you could do it!" Bella turned back to the letter, the euphoria of her accomplishment starting to settle.

"Ah... Well let's see then... It says there's a number. I'll call them to see if there are any scholarships..." Bella was about to head towards her laptop, but Edward grabbed her and and spun her in close.

"You can do that later," he said. "But for now... you deserve a little reward for this."

Bella giggled, putting the letter aside. "What kind of reward?" They locked lips for a second before Edward tapped the tip of her nose.

"Well," he began. "How about this..." He began to walk his fingers up her arm. "Today, you're going to get absolutely pampered. A nice bath, a good massage... And then tonight, I'm taking you anywhere you want to go. Totally on me, whatever you want to eat. And then..." He kissed the corner of her mouth. "And _then_ I get to play with you all night long..."

Bella felt shivers run down her spine as her fingers laced through his hair. "How did I ever get so lucky?" she purred. Chuckling, they nuzzled their noses against one another and Edward playfully licked the tips of her mouth.

"Chance," he said. "Now... what would you like me to do first, Miss College Princess?"

All righty then. Sorry this is a bit short, but this is a very significant plot point, ladies and gents. Anyone here know the classical structure of a Greek tragedy? Yeah.

I'll see you guys later! I'm off to London today! 8D

~T.


	3. Visitors

Sorry I got this in a bit late again. I was going to do it last night, but I was a little too tired. So here we are.

Anyway, about Renesmee... -sigh- might as well just tell you guys so there's no confusion. I will be keeping in a pregnancy. But it will in no way shape or form be the same as the pregnancy in the original BD. So when it happens, don't get pissed. There's a method to my madness. But I am sure as hell not calling her "Renesmee."

**Three: Visitors**

**B**ella was running. Faster than she ever had before. Yet her legs weighed her down immensely, keeping her in one place. She panted and gasped, grasping for anything to propel her forward. Her scenery was blurry; she had no idea where she was. Though she moved slowly, the world around her zipped past without effort. It took her a while to realize that she was in the middle of a forest. The air around her stabbed her insides and her mouth dried with each breath. All she could think to do was run. Run. Run. But from what? Though she pumped her body, she did not feel winded. All around her, she could hear the menacing rustle of trees and foliage. Whatever it was, it was following her. Watching with amusement at her futile escape attempts.

Finally, she stopped running in the middle of a clearing. The trees froze along with her, leaving only a serene vision of a meadow filled with poppy flowers. Her anxiety lessened as her fingers touched the wispy petals around her. That thing couldn't find her here. Not with the waist high flowers that brushed against her. It wouldn't dare. That's when she noticed something in front of her. Dark, rounded, and malevolent. It crept forward, breath huffing through its dripping teeth. Bella could not move. For all the running she was just doing, she couldn't budge. As it came closer to her, the details began to reveal themselves.

It was James. James, one of the first truly frightening monsters that she had ever come across. Standing before her, he was in his bat form, his slimy, scaly wings began to stretch out on his back. His claws on his hands and feet reacted like acid against the dainty flowers, killing them with a mere brush of his talon. His red eyes blared within his black face, his snout wet with the sweet scent of her skin. Bella remained still. With his ears twitching and his jaw unhinging, the terrible creature before her looked ready to eat her in one gulp.

And then, he froze. His red eyes, so menacing and eerie, turned to a creamy, milk white. His body went rigid, and on his chest, blood began to ooze from his pores. He didn't even seem to breathe anymore. As if he had been stuffed for a natural history museum. After a while, his body began to turn to ash. Starting from the tips of his wings and ending at the bottoms of his clawed feet, he dissolved into ash that blew off into the wind. That's when Bella saw what was behind him. Her heard thudded and her breath caught in her throat. The true monster stood before her now, with James nothing more than a past memory. His own red eyes were piercing and pure evil, his lips curled in a sinister smirk.

Alec stood before her now. Grinning. Watching. Waiting.

Bella awoke with a gasp, shooting bolt up in bed. Her entire body was covered with sweat, her eyes wide and her lungs drinking in air. For a while, her open eyes saw nothing but that horrid image of her dream. It took a while for her to blink away that picture, and readjust to the dim light of her bedroom. Finally, as her heart settled and her body relaxed, she put a hand to her breast and closed her eyes. She was able to calm herself. Turning to look down beside her, she saw the naked Edward still sleeping peacefully to her right. The sight calmed her. Wiping the sweat with her blanket, she leaned in and kissed his deathly cold temple. He didn't react, but kept sleeping.

She stayed there for a moment or two, petting his hair and remembering their night before. It had been so perfect, so wonderful. Why then did she have that nightmare? It was usually when her days were bad. Never when they were fantastically good. Yes, she had had this dream before. It had been two years since her kidnapping by a rogue vampire named Victoria, now dead. In an attempt to make good with a genetic vampire clan called the Volturi, Victoria offered Bella as a gift. She would have died had Alec, one of the Volturi vampires, asked to keep her after hearing that she came from the Cullens. Alec had formed a very bloodthirsty grudge against Carlisle (for all intents and purposes, Edward's father) for killing Napoleon Bonaparte, Alec's own father. Thankfully, the head Volturi brother Aro did not want a civil war on his hands, and so he allowed Bella to be rescued without bloodshed. Bella hadn't heard from Alec or the Volturi since.

And yet... there would be times when she would walk home at night and feel a presence of something threatening and omnipotent. Something that watched her make her usual trail from work to home. Something that listened to the clack of her work shoes, and the turn of her key. Whenever she was alone at night, and the wind would blow a certain way, the hairs on the back of her neck would stand up, and her ears became acute to every little sound and shift in her apartment. It had been this way ever since she started living on her own.

Removing herself from bed, she went to the bathroom to wash off whatever sweat she had left over and change into something a little more respectable than... well, nothing really. After getting dressed, she headed into the kitchen to make herself something to eat, switching on the radio as well. White noise from her radio always helped to calm her nerves, though she didn't turn it up loud enough to bother Edward. She made herself a bowl of cereal and thought to herself, her eyes going to the acceptance letter on her counter.

Oh yes. The nightmare merely pushed the good news out of her mind. Swallowing a spoon full of cereal, she picked it up and looked it over. She certainly didn't read it wrong. She had been accepted! This idea pushed out the horrible feelings her dreams gave her and allowed her mind to go elsewhere. However, this pushed it out only for a minute before she realized that she'd probably have to do a lot of scholarship hunting to make this happen. Sipping her orange juice, she began to rack her brains about every financial opportunity she'd been told about ever since getting into high school. But unless she had the memory of an elephant, merely thinking it over would do no good. So, after she finished her food, she set the dishes aside, pulled up her laptop and went to work.

For hours on end, she stared at the computer screen, sending emails, writing down numbers and so on. Of course, no one would answer on a Sunday, so she'd have to call tomorrow to talk to a person. Perhaps she should make up a call schedule for the next day? She scribbled a few important names, and had at least three Google searches going on at once. After hours of work, two full pages from her notebook were crammed with names, numbers, websites, offers and offices. A few were crossed out, some were circled or starred. Bella would have gone on to her third page by that point, had not two cold arms wrapped around her neck.

She almost jumped as Edward leaned in to kiss her cheek. Breaking away from her computer screen, Bella smiled and stood, stretching her stiff back. "Morning," she said brightly.

"Not for much longer," said Edward, gesturing to the clock. Indeed, it was almost noon. She didn't even notice. Edward gave her a little kiss on the lips before rubbing her lower back. "How long have you been up?"

"Uh... since nine or something... I guess." Smiling, she hugged him around his shoulders and pushed their noses together. "I'm making some good progress. Who knows? I might actually be able to get in."

"Let's hope for a miracle then." They shared a bit longer kiss before Bella heard a knock on her door. Still in Edward's arms, she looked over to it.

"Room service!" she heard on the other side. "One roast beef sandwich with cole slaw and deviled eggs!"

Her face suddenly brightened as she instantly recognized the deep tenner of her father. Rushing forward, she flung open the door and hugged him around the middle. Charlie swan laughed, patting her brown head. Ever since she moved, Charlie had done his best to meet up with Bella once a week, but there were times when they couldn't quite see each other. It had been close to three weeks since the last time he visited. Pulling away, she observed her father, getting the faintest compulsion to tweak his mustache.

Charlie Swan was a head taller than his daughter, with salt and pepper hair that was slowly coming towards the salt end of the spectrum. He had wrinkles around his face and two, dark eyes sitting at the bridge of his nose. He usually spoke in a kind but deep voice, a smile hidden beneath the bristles of his scratchy whiskers. Stepping back, she was about to let him in, when she noticed someone else standing behind him.

"What? No hug for me?"

Bella laughed out loud and in surprise. Jacob Black didn't usually come on her father's visits, but there he was. Her best friend from when they were just little kids, Jacob had grown to a very respectable size. By this point, he was already taller than Charlie, but not by much. Despite the fact that he was younger than Bella, Jacob developed into a man rather quickly, his black hair tied into a loose ponytail behind his copper face. He smiled, his dimples popping from each cheek as she hugged him as well. Though at this point in time, it felt more as though she was groping a tree.

"Come in, come in!" She invited both men in and made a space for the bagged lunch her father brought. "I tried calling you last night but you didn't pick up."

"I got the message after work," said Charlie. "So you finally got accepted, huh? Good for you! I knew you could do it, Bells!"

Bella felt a little embarrassed, but smiled nonetheless. She unfurled the brown paper to pull out one of her father's home made roast beef sandwiches with special barbeque sauce and mayo. One of her favorites. Thanking her father, she got herself a plate and was about to sit down Edward walked back into view. He had zipped out of sight when Bella answered the door, and was now in a casual pair of pants and a shirt. The two other men turned to watch as he approached them, hands in his pockets.

"Chief Swan," he said, nodding. Charlie greeted him before Edward flitted his eyes towards Jacob. "Black."

"Cullen."

"Nice day."

"Sure is. Maybe you should go for a walk later? That sunshine should do you good."

"Mm. By the way, how are you doing? I heard that it's flea season – "

"So!" Bella clapped her hands rather loudly. "Do you guys want anything? I still have to go grocery shopping, but I think I have some left over pizza..." Thankfully, her distraction was enough to end the conversation there without any questions from Charlie. Though really, the two had been rather civil with each other lately. Perhaps they'd both grown up? Bella could remember a time when the two were practically ripping at each other's throats. Now they could sit in the same room together. That was major progress for them.

Of course, there were two main reasons why Edward and Jacob couldn't stand one another. The first was the fact that Edward was a vampire. Jacob's family, on the other hand, was an ancient native line of shifters, Jacob himself being a wolf shifter. The Blacks and the Cullens had never been on perfect relations. While Carlisle and his family did promise to uphold the peace, Billy (Jacob's father) and his own have always been suspicious of the vampire clan. Ultimately, a treaty was held between the two, albeit an uneasy one. The other main reason was that Edward had been dating Bella for the better of four years, and Jacob had seemed to have a crush on her for a good chunk of time as well. Either way, it was not a good mixture.

"So, do you know where you're staying yet?" Jacob asked, watching her eat. "Do you have a dorm room or something?"

"Oh I don't know that," said Bella. "I've been researching scholarships and grants and stuff all day."

"You haven't even looked at pictures?"

"I've been there before. I know what it looks like."

Charlie smiled weakly. "You know, your mom and I are happy to help any way we can. And I think Grandpa Wilson wants to help too." Charlie never liked to see Bella go without money. If he could, he would give her his entire pay check, and Bella knew this. Which was exactly why she barely let him help with finances like bills. Every once in a while, he would go grocery shopping without her permission. Or with it.

"I'll be fine, Daddy," she said, taking his hand. "Really. I can find scholarships."

"Still," said Charlie, "I'm pretty sure your college fund can help us a whole lot. Tomorrow, I'm heading to the bank to see what we have to work with."

They continued to talk over finances, all the while Edward watched from the living room. Or listened, rather. He read a magazine in the shadow of the curtain, his eyes usually fixated on one spot so that he could eavesdrop on her conversation. At around two o'clock, however, both Charlie and Jacob had to head back to Forks. Bella walked them to the door, thanking them for the sandwich and the congratulations. Charlie gave her one last hug. "If you need anything," he said, "just call, Bella."

"I will, Dad." She waved to them both as they walked down the hallway, leaving Bella to her thoughts. Edward was silent as she shut and locked the door. Going to clean up the kitchen, she did so while humming to herself, glad that so many people cared about her. It was only after she had finished her dishes that she realized that Edward hadn't moved from his spot.

"My offer still stands."

"And so does my answer." Walking over to him, she removed the magazine from his hands and sat on his lap, facing him. "I love you, Edward. I really do. But this is something I need to do on my own. Can you understand that?"

Edward sighed. "Yes." Looking up, he placed his flat hands against her back and drew her in. The two laid their foreheads together, listening to each other's breath. Finally: "Black got chubby."

"Edward!" Bella lightly swatted his chest. "That's not nice."

"No. He seriously did. Didn't you notice? He got huge."

"Tall yeah, but not fat."

"Tall is just a nice way of saying fat."

"You're tall."

"Yes, but I'm thin, too. So ha."

Laughing, Bella shook her head. "You are horrible, Edward Cullen." His lips took on a slick smirk as he brought Bella down for a quick kiss.

So there we are... More character catch up. And maybe some foreshadowing... -cough-

~T.


	4. To the Rescue

I am so sorry that this was so late. I couldn't update this forever because i kept getting an error whenever I tried B( But it's working again, the stupid son of a bitch.

All right so... in my latest reviews, someone asked me to do a crossover between Hellsing and Twilight. Please excuse me for going into a bitch mode for a split second while I reiterate: I do not like Twilight. At all. I am not doing this because I'm a fan, I'm doing this because someone dared me to write better than Twilight since I was bad mouthing it. Hellsing I do like. In fact, I love it. It's one of my favorite animes/mangas. Even if I dealt with the characters from my rewrite in a cross over, the two are in completely different worlds. I did one cross over for comedy, but that's it. Alucard is too awesome to be exposed to sparkling fairies.

**Four: To the Rescue**

"**A**re you sure I missed it? I mean... there's got to be somethi-"

"_I'm sorry, I'm afraid you missed the deadline for all of our grants for the fall semester. I can give you a website if you'd like. Though I don't know if you missed it for that, too._"

Bella sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose. "Yes, please. Thank you." Taking a pencil, she scribbled down the address and thanked the woman on the phone again. Hanging up, she typed it into the url before realizing that she had visited this site at least six times already. The last thing she wanted to be reminded of was that scholarship money wasn't available until winter that next year a seventh time. With a heavy sigh, Bella slumped in her chair and stared at the crumpled papers and scribbled chicken-scratch notes all around her. She had spent the free time of the past week looking up anything that could help pay for college. So far, she was able to get $1500 in grants, and qualified for $5000 in loans with interest rates of 10% after the first year. Combining those two factors with the money her parents could fiscally afford and her current salary, Bella still wasn't even scratching the surface of what she needed to pay just one term off at school. After almost five straight days of this, Bella was starting to think that it was futile.

Her fingers went through her frizzy hair, closing her baggy eyes. Now that Edward had left, Bella was free to wallow in worry like a pig in mud. What if she didn't have enough? What if she had to get a bank loan with some insane interest rate? What if she got herself into a mountain of debt and ended up homeless because she couldn't pay it off, and jobless because no one was heiring photographers, and forced to eat out of trashcans and talk to cats because of some mental illness she contrived while being on the streets? Shaking her head, Bella got up and went to the kitchen, getting herself a glass of water. Why did all of this have to be so damned difficult? Maybe if she went to the board of directors at the school, crawling on her hands and knees, they'd go easy on her and just let her clean or something for her tuition? Head throbbing, she rubbed it with her sharp fingers, sighing at the brim of the cup. Of course, the last time she even _talked_ to them, it was very clear that most of the scholarships went to people who studied more active arts, like film and screen writing and theater. Photo students were generally an after thought. She put the palm of her hand to one of her eyes, sighing through her lips like a horse.

_Tap tap tap._

Blinking, Bella looked up. It was starting to rain outside, so she shouldn't have been _too_ surprised to see Edward so early. Walking over, she unlatched the window, invited him in, and then grabbed him a towel. The vampire dried off his hair with it before shaking it out like a dog. "Hey there, sweetness."

"Hi." Not even Edward seemed to be able to lift her spirits. Turning, she went back to her computer and typed in yet another google search for "photography scholarships." Her heart only sunk more when she saw all the purple links stare back at her. Edward's chilled arms came around her neck.

"Working hard?"

"Mm. I feel like I'm banging my head against the wall..." She leaned back into him, closing her eyes and feeling that damp jacket against her hair. "Why don't you go toss your clothes in the bath tub?"

Edward chuckled. "It's not like I'm going to catch a cold."

"Oh... Yeah, huh?" Her brain was slow, apparently. "Sorry. I guess I can't think straight tonight." She leaned forward to type in another search, but her chair was suddenly turned towards her vampire boyfriend. He put their noses together, his gold eyes bright as he smiled kindly.

"Admit it."

She stared, blankly, at the boy in front of her. "Admit what...?"

"You just want to see me naked."

There was a pause. After a moment or two, Bella actually started to laugh. Finally able to tare herself from her computer screen, she hugged him around the neck. "You're such a tard, Edward..." she said lovingly. He pulled her from that chair and shut her laptop closed. Bella made a noise of protest, but Edward wouldn't hear of it.

"The weekends are our time together," he reminded her. "You can bang your head against the wall tomorrow." Setting her on the couch, he took off his jacket. "Besides... I have a present for you."

"Present?" She watched him as he slid something out of the inside pocket of his jacket. It was a plastic bag wrapped over something flat and long and wide.

"Now, don't you dare say you won't take it." Sitting beside her, he tossed off his boots and handed it to her. It was light in her hands. A comic book? Bella gave Edward a funny look, but he motioned for her to open it. So, confused, she pulled the plastic bag off and pulled out a comic book, just as she predicted. When she realized what it was, however, her breath hitched in her throat, her eyes widened, and her heart quite literally stopped for only a moment.

What Bella held in her hands was no ordinary comic book. Still kept in mint condition within a plastic sleeve, Bella stared at the old, crumbling pages of an _Action One. _A genuine 1930's copy of the very first _Superman_ comic ever printed. And though Bella didn't make a habit of reading comic books, she wasn't such a ditz that she didn't know what one of these was worth. The last time she heard, it was well over six hundred thousand dollars. Slowly, she turned her astonished face to Edward. He explained before she asked.

"I got this for Anna as a birthday present. It was a little lame at the time, but she enjoyed it. Now, well... I figure it would do you some good. I sure don't want it. I don't even like comic books."

Bella gaped like a fish out of water, her eyes going between Edward and the half a million dollar collectable she held in her hands. This... this was amazing. Not only could she pay all four years tuition and supplies with this comic book, but she would have money left over for her own place after graduating. Perhaps even a new car, new clothes... A whole new life! Her heart throbbed as she realized just how valuable this comic was. Not just because of its financial value, no. The fact that Edward was giving this to her was, in a way, a blessing for her freedom. Not to say that she was a prisoner, no. But this much money would help her live the life she wanted without struggling, which meant that she was free to live her dreams without the fears she was previously experiencing. She wouldn't have to work dead end jobs to make ends meet, at least not for a little while. And even then, if she used it wisely, she could invest and keep herself comfortable for a long time. She could be a photographer full time, no matter what the pay was! The world was limitless now, all because of that little book that she held in her hands.

She started to cry.

It wasn't a sobbing, wailing cry. Bella was silent, letting the tears roll off of her and onto her lap. The weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders. As she cried, she forgot about her previous arguments about needing to fend for herself. True though this was, only an idiot would pass up this opportunity. So she sat, and cried, and silently thanked Edward for his gift.

Gently, Edward slipped the comic out of her hands and laid it on the table in front of them. Then, he embraced Bella fully, bringing her as close as he could to his chest. Bella had grown used to the silence of his body, but as she curled up in his arms, she could swore that she faintly heard his heart beat. Her thin arms wrapped around him, gripping the back of his shirt as tightly as she could.

"Thank you," she choked out. "Oh Edward, thank you!" That seemed to break the floodgates, and she cried even harder, causing Edward to laugh.

"Come on, Bella... there's no need to cry..." He wiped her face as she sat up. Bella rubbed her nose roughly.

"B-b-but I'm s-s-so h-h-ha-_peeeeeyy!_" With another wail, she collapsed into his arms yet again, causing Edward to laugh even more. They stayed like that for a while, Edward holding her until she had calmed down enough to breathe properly. When they pulled back, Bella practically attacked his lips with hers, suddenly swinging from excessively crying to horny as hell. She slid onto his lap, gripping his hair and kissing him ferociously. "Oh God... Oh _God_ I love you, Edward." Her eyes were still a bit puffy, but she ignored them, kissing him again and again. She was _so_ in the mood at this point. She would pretty much do anything and everything for him. It didn't even matter to her. She even leaned down to bite as his neck.

"You want me?" she huffed seductively. "You can have me tonight... any way you want." She could already feel Edward's skin switching from cool to boiling. She felt his fangs brush up against her cheek.

"Right here," he growled. "Right in the livingroom."

Lord did that sound hot. Bella turned to look behind her before grabbing the comic and safely putting it on the kitchen counter. Just in case. Coming back, she perched on Edward's lap, removing her top. They instantly began foreplay, Bella huffing like an animal in heat. Just when they were about to get down and dirty, Bella heard a crash of thunder outside, causing the lights to suddenly switch off. Bella and Edward paused, looking around the dark room. A power outage because of the rain, probably.

"Huh," said Edward. "You want me to check the lights?" Bella looked down at him before grinning. Grabbing his shoulders, she practically thrust him down onto the couch by his shoulders.

"Fuck the lights."

Leave those lovely reviews so I know who's reading :3

~T.


	5. Through the Darkness

Hey everyone. Again, sorry about the hiccup in updating. That was the website's fault, not mine D8

Unfortunately, this late chapter IS my fault, and I apologize -.-; But I have an excuse! Between going from France to Italy for spring break, and then Scotland for Easter weekend, and then focusing on both my school work and all the stuff I'm doing here in Oxford... Yeah. I've been a busy bee. Not to mention I am now becoming obsessed with _Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt_. That doesn't really help me much. But regardless! I've only about three weeks left, and then I'll be back in the USA, and back to my normal(ish) updates.

**Five: Through the Darkness**

**T**here wasn't anything particularly bad about Bella's job, other than the fact that she got called in from her days off on occasion. It paid decently for what it was, and there were certainly worse jobs than what she had, not to mention that not every workplace let you have free ice cream. Yet, as she finished up her final day, two weeks after her notice was put in, Bella couldn't help but feel a sense of relief. Relief in the idea that she wouldn't have to worry about paying the bills again this month, or worry if her electricity would be shut off, or worry that she would get to work on time. She said goodbye to her coworkers and boss, and folded up her apron for the final time. One of her fellow employees, Emily, actually got her a little "goodbye" ice-cream cake, which they all shared in the break room. It was a pleasant way of ending her job, to say the very least. But once it was over, she said her final goodbyes, and then headed out of the ice cream shop for the last time.

Stepping out into the cool, brisk air, Bella found herself hugging her arms. It was chillier than most nights, especially since they were already heading towards summer, but Bella pulled on the jacket she had taken with her before starting her walk home. Hands in her pockets, she walked with a little spring in her step, and a smile on her face. Life had just seemed to get so much better after Edward's gift. Truly, she felt the wind beneath her wings. She was ready to fly. In fact, her good mood was enough to distract her from her nightmares.

Yes... they still appeared in her sleep from time to time. Even after her slew of happy days, her nights were still plagued with such terrible images of villains long since past. Namely Alec. That man still sent such shivers down her spine. Just thinking about him caused her to be even more cold, her body shaking to try and warm herself. She figured she'd pick up the pace to help it along. But to no avail. As she walked, the wind pushed back her bushy hair, roughly biting at her neck and face. She turned the corner and was about to head back to her apartment building, when something of a shock ran up her spine and stopped her dead in her tracks.

She was a mere block away from home. She could see her neighbor's window burning in the dark brick. And yet, she could not bring herself to move. Not just yet. Something kept her there. Something that constricted her muscles and kept her from walking. As though her eyes were magnets, her gaze was drawn to the dark ally way that sat just beside her. What was she looking for? What was even there? Yet another harsh blast of wind hit her and she embraced her arms even tighter. That's when she saw something. Off in the distance of the ally. Something moving.

She should run. She should turn around and run back to safety. Back where she could lock her doors and windows and hide in her room for the rest of the night. Yet her feet began to drag her forward. Why? Why was she drawn to this horrible feeling? The thing she saw move moved yet again, making its way from the right hand side to the left. Cloaked in shadow, Bella could make out close to no details about the figure, other than the fact that it was hunched and the size of a human being.

Her body now shook for reasons other than the cold as she stepped forward, eyes wide. "Hello?" she called softly. The figure grunted, swaying on its feet before making its way towards her. Bella froze as it approached, a fear grasping at her heart. Its swagger was lopsided and sloppy, and its noises were deep. Almost growling. Bella's mind began to kick in bit by bit as she backed away. The thing continued to come at her, a ragged, horrid breathing escaping it with every step. Finally, she had hit the safety of the street lamp, and the creature appeared in the lamp light as well. Bella almost felt relief when she realized that this was nothing more than a drunkard.

"Heeey pretty lady..." he gushed, his eyes yellow from alcohol. "How _you_ doin', eh? Ya wanna lil' fun - ?" Thankfully, as he reached for her, his balance got the better of him and he fell to the ground. Bella jumped back and saw him stay there. As he refused to move, Bella almost felt a bit of disappointment in this realization. She didn't know why, but something was telling her that whatever was in that ally could have... Well... she didn't quite know. Perhaps she had a feeling that something there could have given her more insight in her dreams. Now that she could step aside and look at such an idea rationally, she realized just how stupid that thought was. Irritated with herself, she turned from the drunk and proceeded on her way home.

Walking in at the usual time, the lobby floor was deserted as it always was. A dim light hung from the ceiling above the mail boxes, which she checked before heading upstairs to her apartment. She ran through her mail, scanning over each envelope in turn. Instead of grimacing at the sight of bills, she instead smiled brightly. Taking out her key, she hummed softly and reminded herself that she and Edward were going to get that comic book valued and sold this weekend. That brought yet another rush of emotion and she sighed in love and content. She was almost sad, really, that she'd be leaving him eventually. If she could, she would make time stop for them. And let them remain as they were until the end of time. These thoughts were fanciful and childish. She knew that. Still... there was no harm in just _thinking_ them, was there? A flight of fancy, perhaps. Something completely improbable, more than likely. So long as she understood that, she found no problem keeping them to herself.

She set her keys on the counter and began to change into her bedclothes, hoping that maybe a bit of cough syrup could give her some dreamless sleep for tonight. But just as she was brushing her teeth, her eyes caught sight of the window in her mirror. It was looking down onto the bit of street that Bella had just walked from, and where the drunkard was still laying. She wondered, vaguely, if the man would get sober before he was found by police. But just as she wandered over by the window, she saw the man stumble onto his feet, wiping himself off sloppily. He was getting ready to stumble his way back home when yet another shadowed figure loomed up behind him.

He seemed to get the drunkard's attention. The man was distracted by this other figure, speaking for a moment or two before turning to leave. But the figure's hand reached out and fell to the man's shoulder. The drunk blinked, swaying backwards before coming forwards. The hand stretched from the man's shoulder up to the man's cheek. Bella blinked, realizing what a seductive motion it was. But she remained there, staring. That hand trailed from his cheek down to his neck. The drunk man seemed powerless at this point, and merely wobbled on his feet listlessly. Suddenly, the man in the shadow's jerked, and the drunkard flailed back in surprise. But just before he could get away, the hand jerked for him and dug its nails into the man's neck. With one sharp tug, the man was gone.

Bella pulled away, closing her curtains sharply. What had she just seen? Hundreds of thousands of scenarios ran through her mind. Perhaps it was merely another drunk? Maybe there was just a small fight and Bella needn't be so paranoid. But when she replayed what she saw over and over again, she couldn't help but feel a terrible, cold feeling in the pit of her stomach. Running forward, she yanked the blinds closed and gripped them tightly in her hands. What was she even expecting? After all... she was safe here. Seattle wasn't Forks. There were too many people here. Too many smells to distract anyone who might be looking for her.

Slowly, she backed away from the window, afraid to stay too close to it anymore. Her trembling hands gripped against her bosom as she stared in between the crack of the two curtains. The dim, amber light of the lamp posts outside fell to the carpet in a hazy buzz. Throat constricting, she stared, slowly backing herself away. Then, she saw a shadow suddenly whizz by it.

Heart jumping into her mouth, Bella ran forward and yanked the curtains back, looking desperately all around. But she saw nothing. Nothing but infinite black and gray, the cold, icy colors looming about, concealing anything that may want to kill her. Still shaking horribly, Bella slowly closed her curtains and turned away from them, making her way towards the kitchen. A little calming tea should help her nerves. Turning on the stove, she put a pot of water on and then pulled out a mug and a tea bag. As she let the water heat, Bella placed her forehead on the rough surface of her fridge door, listening to it hum. Her body relaxed, and her hands dangled from either side.

That's when the phone rang.

Bella shot straight up, staring at the phone with giant eyes. It rang again. What should she do? Answer it? Slowly, ever so slowly, she inched her way towards the phone, its ominous ringing getting louder with each new jingle. She extended her hand, fingers circling the receiver. Then, she picked it up and brought it to her ear. Mouth dry and heart banging inside her ears, she swallowed.

"Hello?" she asked, her voice small. No answer came. Nothing but the sound of white noise. Her body clenched against that phone, her teeth clamping down on her bottom lip. "Who is this?" she demanded, a little more forcefully. "Who the fuck is this? I'm calling the police in five minutes if you don't tell me who this is!"

Her inquiry was greeted with only a laugh.

That laugh filled her in the worst possible way. It shook her very foundation, flooding every inch of her body with a cold, chilling fear. She knew that laugh. She knew it from her nightmares. From those horrible days in Italy, she knew it. It haunted her in her most peaceful hours. Made her paranoid of the shadows on her own walls. It was the laugh of Alec Volturi.

Slamming the phone down, she stared at it, nearly coming to tears. She stood there for a good minute before the phone rang again. In a rushed terror, she yanked the phone cord from the thing and pulled back so that she was flat up against the fridge. For some reason, she feared that it would ring again. Then, a high pitched scream hit her ears and she fell to the floor on her knees, covering her ears. It was only after the scream continued for a minute that Bella realized what it really was; her tea was ready.

Rushing up, she turned off the flame and set the pot on a different burner. Her eyes were wet by this point, her face white with fear. She quickly wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand, her breath uneasy and choppy. After she calmed herself from crying, Bella made herself a cup of tea and retired to her room. There, she locked her window, shut her curtains, and drank only by the light of the reading lamp beside her bed. Scrunched up in her warm blanket, she listened for any noise that night. But all she heard was the pitter patter of starting rain.

The sooner she got to sunny California, the better.

And so, a question. Was it really Alec Bella heard and saw? Or is this just her mind playing tricks on her? Remember to leave those lovely comments!

~T.


	6. Helplessness

Hey again. This is my last week in England, so that means faster updates! Yay! I may go back to weekly Sunday/Monday updates, but I haven't decided yet. This one is worth the wait anyway.

**Six: Helpless **

**S**ince her episode with Victoria during her senior year of high school, Bella developed a slight aversion to airplanes and airports. Which was why, with the money she now had, Bella chose instead to ride a train down from Washington to California. The remainder of her classes finished for the semester, and Bella had found a nice little apartment to stay at until the school year began. So, packing everything she needed, and putting the apartment up for rent, the day of her departure finally fell upon her. It seemed surreal at first. As she awoke to the sound of her alarm clock, it echoed at first as a strange noise in her dream before her eyes shifted open. Even after she shut the clock off, a part of her still thought the alarm belonged to her slumber. Slowly, her mind started working properly and she sat up, bringing her knees to her chest.

Boxes of all sorts littered around her, her suitcases packed and repacked for the day's journey. She would get on the train tonight and arrive in Los Angeles about thirty eight hours later. The night before, as she was putting away her things, she couldn't help but feel an overflowing excitement, grinning and randomly bursting into whatever song was playing on her iPod. Though this day promised to be sunny, Edward popped over for one last good night together, and then left before she awoke that day. Perhaps that was one of the reasons why she felt a sudden unsettling dread. She stared at the empty sheets beside her, her fingers touching the faint imprint that he had left behind. His smell still lingered there, a dent in her pillow showing where he had slept that night. Taking another look around her, so many memories flooded back to her. The sounds of lingering laughter filled her memories, the haunting images of so many happy times suddenly coming back to her. Flopping back down on her bed, her eyes lingered on the ceiling. Should she look around her room too much, she may start crying.

But thankfully, she'd have a distraction all day. Forcing herself from her bed, Bella left just in time to meet Charlie and Jacob downtown for lunch. Though Bella had plenty of money now (as far as her father knew, she just happened to find that comic book at a yard sale) her father still insisted on paying for the meal, which Jacob was more than happy to take advantage of. Honestly, Bella could have ordered nothing, and still feasted on Jacob's unlimited buffet. She rolled her eyes as he wolfed down (no pun intended) his third hot dog.

"I guess I'm glad to see that nothing's changed, but you don't want to eat the restaurant out of business, do you?" He merely smiled, his teeth open to show the bits of bun that were shoved in his mouth like packing peanuts. Her eyes turned to Charlie. "Really Dad. You should let me pay for a little bit of this. With how much he eats, you won't have a paycheck anymore."

"I think I can handle a little over eating," he said with a smile. "You worry too much. Enjoy yourself, yeah? That's why we're here."

"I am, Daddy. Don't worry." She sipped at her chocolate milk shake, her eyes turning out the window at the city beyond. "It feels weird... Leaving. It's going to be completely different."

Charlie nodded, taking a bite of his own hamburger. "Yeah. But you shouldn't look at that as a bad thing." Wiping the mustered off of his mustache, Charlie cleared his throat and continued. "The world is going to open up for you, Bella. Your entire life is going to be flipped upside down. You should be ready to embrace it. You know, prepare for anything!"

She smiled sweetly. "I know. And I am. I'm just going to miss it here as all."

Jacob, after swallowing the lump of food in his mouth, took a sip of his soda before chiming in. "We're going to miss you too. Which is why you'd better visit us for breaks and holidays."

That made Bella smile. Promising she will, she grabbed the dessert menu and began to scan the various different cakes and ice creams. For the most part after that, Bella was delightfully side tracked from the day ahead of her. It seemed as though Charlie and Jacob weren't the only ones who came up to see her off; Jessica and Mike happened to swing by as well, having heard the news through the grapevine. Two years since high school and the pair was still a couple. Jessica gave a tearful goodbye speech to her friend, and began planning all kinds of trips for them down in California. With the way she went on about it, she'd be practically living there if she had her way. Bella only smiled weakly, hoping that Jessica was only half serious. But after goodbyes aplenty, the sun set, and the time finally came for Bella to leave.

She gave one last hug to her father and wave to her friends before turning and heading down to the ticket counter. That heavy feeling of depression fell on her the minute she got her ticket, and she sat herself down, waiting for her train number to be called. Her eyes drifted to the big clock against the wall, watching as the seconds ticked into minutes. In twenty minutes, her train would begin to board, and in thirty eight hours and twenty minutes, she'd be on her way to a new life.

"I guess this is goodbye."

That voice that she loved to hear so much, that cooed to her as she slept, and calmed her in her darkest hours, floated out behind her. She didn't need to turn around. Instead, she smiled bitterly, staring at her fingers as they traced the black ink of her ticket stub. After a moment of silence, Edward sat beside her, his cold hand resting on the back of her neck. It made her shiver in the most wonderful way, and she leaned against him, nuzzling her nose beneath his chin. Her hands pressed up against his hard chest, wishing now more than ever that she could feel a heartbeat. As they embraced, the sound around her seemed to drown out, and she closed her eyes peacefully. Happy to just... be.

"It won't be forever," she said softly. Her voice was weak and frail, but she refused to cry. Reaching up, she laced her fingers through the strangled strands of his hair, listening to his deep breathing. "I'll come back. For visits and things..."

From his chest rumbled a small, breathy laugh. "Ah Bella... If only you saw the world like I do." Pulling away, he traced the back of his fingers against her rounded cheek. "I know what's going to happen. You'll come back, and you'll visit. And we may even still be in love for a while more. But sooner or later, you're going to _live_. And I'll be proud of you. But it won't be the same between us. It never will."

Bella clamped her teeth on the inside of her lip so as to keep it from trembling. She tried to look away, but he tilted her chin back up, giving her a sweet and tender kiss. "Don't feel bad," he said softly. "This was an amazing adventure. I'll always love you, Bella Swan..." He ran his fingers through her hair. "But it'd be cruel not to share you..."

"_All passengers on the south bound Amtrak to Los Angeles station, board Track 3. This is the first boarding call for Amtrak south bound 192._"

Those words chilled poor Bella to the core, and she clutched Edward tighter. Closing her eyes, she forced herself to stop the tears that sat on the tips of her eyes. Edward held her just as tightly, his breath gently sliding past her ear. When they pulled back, Bella and Edward stared at one another, before the vampire pulled them back into one last, sweet kiss. The warmth of his inner mouth made Bella melt with yearning, her heart hammering desperately in her throat. Oh how could she leave this man? This wonderful man, who cared and loved her. How could she abandon him like this?

But this was right. This was how it was supposed to be. Breaking away, Bella gave him one last, misted look before forcing herself to turn away, grab her bag, and start heading for the train. She was able to keep her composure for the most part. But the minute she closed her cabin door and set her bag aside, Bella collapsed on the bed in her sleeper car and cried into her pillow. It was a good three hours before she actually fell asleep, sheets wet and eyes puffy.

Aside from such a pained goodbye, Bella was determined to make the most out of her day and a half train ride. Unfortunately for her, there was no internet on the train, or else it would have been a lot more bearable. But at least she had a couple books and movies to keep her occupied. Ultimately, it was a fairly boring train ride. Until the second night.

She had just finished her dinner from the cafe car and was heading off to bed for the evening. She'd already crossed the state line, and was half way through California all ready. According to the porter, she'd arrive in Union Station by noon the next day. Yawning, Bella closed her door and laid down in her bed, picking up the novel on the table beside it. _Dracula_ again. She didn't know why she wanted to torture herself by reading about vampires, but she took some solace in the story. Flipping it to her bookmark, she began to read where she left off.

_We shuddered with horror. I could see by the tremulous light that even Van Helsing's iron nerve had failed. Arthur was next to me, and if I had not seized his arm and held him up, he would have fallen._

_When Lucy – I call the thing that was before us Lucy because it bore her shape – saw us she drew back with an angry snarl, such as a cat gives when taken unawares; then her eyes ranged over us. Lucy's eyes in form and colour; but Lucy's eyes unclean and full of hell-fire, instead of the pure, gentle orbs we knew. At that moment the remnant of my love passed into loathing; had she then to be killed, I could have done it with savage delight. As she looked, her eyes blazed with unholy light, and the face became wreathed with a voluptuous smile. Oh, God, how it made me shudder to see it!_

Bella's eyes would have gone on, but a sudden creak rocked through the train, and her focus was thrown off. Blinking, Bella looked through the window of her door. She stood and pried it open to look out into the hallway. A haunting absence greeted her amidst the rackity-clack of the wheels beneath the train car. It was a hollow sound. Pacing itself at a rhythmic, mechanical heart beat, clacking and shaking as it went along the tracks. Bella gripped the wall tightly with her fingers, surveying it one last time before shutting and locking the door tight. After a moment's pause, she drew the curtains in front of the door window and returned to her bed. She listened carefully, but when no other sound found her, she went back to reading.

_With a careless motion, she flung to the ground, callous as a devil, the child that up to now she had clutched strenuously to her breast, growling over it as a dog growls over a bone. The child gave a sharp cry, and lay there moaning. There was a cold-bloodedness in the act which wrung a groan from Arthur' when she advanced to him with outstretched arms and a wanton smile, he fell back and hid his face in his hands._

_She still advanced, however, and with a languorous, voluptuous grace, said: - _

"_Bella..."_

Bella's head snapped up immediately. That was no crack of the train. Putting the book aside, she stood up straight and peered out her side window. Nothing but dark countryside. But she would not take chances. Quickly, Bella rummaged through her makeup bag and pulled out that same, silver cross that had been with her all these years. Wrapping it around her neck, she knelt down beside the stool that sat at the foot of her bed. With as much strength as she could muster, Bella kicked and yanked on one of the legs until it came loose. Then, desperately, she also pulled out a small pocket knife that she got for a birthday and began carving away at its point. All the while, her eyes darted from place to place around her, bouncing back to the window again and again.

Finally when her stake was carved, she grabbed her phone and quickly found Carlisle's number. It ran for what seemed like ages, Bella's heart hammering in her mind. "Pick up pick up..." she begged softly, crouching down by her bedside. Sweat gathered in the palm of her hand, and she gripped her stake tighter to try and keep it from swelling. Finally, just before it went into voice mail, Carlisle's voice came on.

"_Bella?"_

"Carlisle!" she said frantically. "I think Alec followed me. I think he's here on the train!"

What Carlisle said next, Bella could not make out. Bits and pieces of his voice flew in and out through the receiver, but nothing decipherable. Looking out her window, Bella saw why. The train had suddenly rushed into a tunnel, the sound of the metal wheels echoing off of the rocky walls around them. Bella stared at her phone in fear to see that absolutely no bars remained. Shakily, she put it back and clung to her stake for dear life. Every sound became more and more menacing, every shift of the train throwing her off balance.

That's when ten sharpened fingernails suddenly pierced through the roof of her sleeper car.

Bella cried out in surprise, before scrambling to her feet and yanking the door open. With no one down the hallway, she fled, not bothering to look behind her. Where she would go, she didn't have a clue. Somewhere, anywhere, that she could hide. But then, just as she reached the door to the baggage area, the form of Alec flashed in front of her, materializing out of thin air. Bella screamed and stopped herself just before they could collide against one another. With a sickening grin, Alec pushed his hand forward and gripped her throat, digging his nails into her flesh. He slammed her back into the side of the hallway, pulling her an inch off the ground. She choked and sputtered, fighting desperately for breath. But she was not done for yet. Nearly a split second later, Bella launched the pointed end of her stake straight through Alec's heart.

He stumbled backwards, releasing Bella and letting her fall to her feet. Slowly, she backed towards the luggage area, watching him. Waiting for him to die. But slowly, that look of shock melted into a grin of defiance. Standing up straight, Alec wrapped his fingers around the stake. "What kind of flimsy creature do you take me for... _little girl_?" With a tug, he yanked the stake from his chest, a small amount of blood falling from his hole. Bella watched in horror as he tossed her only weapon aside without care. Close to tears, Bella yanked open the door to the luggage storage and thrust herself inside. But it took only a moment before Alec was on her, grabbing and yanking at her body mercilessly. Behind them, she could hear the shouts of others, but it only brought her more fear. He would kill whoever got close!

However, the humans who tried to intervene did not get far. The minute Alec had a firm grip on her, something happened around Bella. A puff of smoke quickly encased her, and she was jerked into a strange, warped nothingness, making her body stretch and her ears pop. Before she knew it, she was somewhere completely different; a forest, it looked like. Somewhere where no one could possibly find her.

Somehow she was able to jerk her hands away, which in turn caused her to stumble backwards, tripping on her own two feet. The horrible, twisted face of Alec watched with glee as something hit her heel, sending her flying backwards down into a wide hole in the ground. Almost like a small cave. Hidden from the world around her. Her body rolled and rolled until she was flat on her back, coughing up dirt that found its way into her mouth. The small bit of light that made it through that opening was suddenly blocked by Alec's imposing figure. Bella's wide eyes followed him as he came forward. She tried to rush away, but Alec grabbed her by the throat yet again, pinning her down. This time, air was even harder to get to, and her eyes nearly bulged out of her head. She looked up, spitting and coughing as he gripped her neck tight enough to snap it. Through some means, she found her voice.

"A...are you going... to kill me?" she choked out.

Alec's face filled with even more malicious pleasure, his red eyes glowing with lust in his shadowed face. "No," he purred. His tongue came out, licking his hungering lips. "That would be far too simple..." Leaning downward, he let that long, wet organ salivate all over the crux of her neck. Bella shut her eyes, so many horrible images and sickly feelings coming to her. It wasn't long before those familiar fangs pierced her neck. She screamed, that frightening feeling of euphoria coming over her.

Her body convulsed, trying to fight off that orgasmic sensation that spread throughout her. But it was no easy task. As blood drained from her body, so did most of her will. Yet when he finished, she still managed to whimper and try to scoot herself away. But Alec was far too excited and strong to let her go. Instead, he pinned her by her shoulder, his other hand going in between her legs. Harsh shivers ran up her spine as his thumb nail creased its way down the hem lining of her jeans. She shut her eyes, trying to block it out, but only felt those pants being ripped from her body. At this point, she was sobbing, absolutely and completely alone. Alec licked her bite wound affectionately before taring her underwear away as well. Forcefully spreading her legs, he dug his nails into her cheeks, shaking her head until she opened her eyes, staring petrified at the vampire above her.

"I'm going to make you live instead."

For what seemed like hours, Bella's body was in non stop pain. After the first ten minutes, her voice could no longer scream, her inner throat wrecked and torn from doing so. Alec's laughter filled her ears, as did the sounds of her breaking and bruising body. He bit anywhere he liked, drinking greedily, but not enough to kill her. His hard, unforgiving body ravaged her weak one, taring her apart from the inside out. Blood that was not drank spilled from her split skin, seeping into a damp puddle beneath her thighs. His breath ran over his lips and nose and ears, infecting her with terrible, horrible smells and sounds. Ones that latched onto her very soul.

Finally, Alec stopped. He raised himself from her wretched body, looking over her. At this point, Bella had become numb. She had no strength in any part of her, except to breath and to blink. Her eyes stared blankly above her at the ceiling of dirt, her lips dry and paled of their natural color. Bella's clothes were now all off, and budding, purple bruises blossomed along her pale skin, as well as several little spots of mirroring pin pricks. Alec wiped his mouth on the back of his wrist and sat on his knees, buttoning his pants back together. His grin was now stained with splotches of pink and red.

"You truly are a delight," he hissed. By now, the rays of the early morning were starting to seep through the opening of the cave. Alec turned to spy them before shifting back to Bella. Leaning down, he left a long, searing kiss on the corner of her mouth, and then turned and left. Leaving Bella to die.

For three days she laid there. She had no energy to move whatsoever. Only to sleep and wake. She didn't even have the stamina to cry. How she lived after such an ordeal was a mystery to her. As she laid on the floor of her cave, she watched the world turn and change outside the opening. Every once in a while, an animal would cross her path. Usually a rabbit or a deer or a fox. Nothing came for her. Not even a bear to put her out of her misery. The cold of the night made her skin crawl, and by the second day, her hunger was causing her stomach to curl within itself. But Alec's attack literally left her paralyzed for seventy two hours. On the third night, Bella was sure she would not awaken in the morning, when off in the distance, she heard a voice.

"_Bella...! Bella...!"_

Bella had no voice to call out, else she would have. Instead, she laid there, eyes glued to the woods outside, and prayed that the owner of that voice would find her. It took only a moment more before two feet found their way to her cave. "Bella!" came a familiar cry. A silhouette bent down to look at her. She could see gold eyes fraught with worry, and she felt a relief wash over her numb body. Edward was almost too shocked to move, before he rushed to her side and encased her in his arms.

"Oh... oh God... oh..." He looked almost physically ill, pulling off his jacket to wrap around her. It took a warm, salty drop on her face to realize that he was crying. Bella had seen him cry only once. And it was not at all like this. This human, uncontrollable weeping as he brought her to his breast. Carrying her close to him, Edward emerged from the cave, still crying hysterically, as he called out for the others. At this point, Bella could hear the voices of the rest of the Cullens, but her eyes were going blurry. The whole world around her started to spin. And after a moment of inaudible chatter, she passed out in Edward's cold, hard arms.

Told you this one got dark. Leave those reviews!

~T.


	7. The Beginning of the End

Hey everyone. Ok, I know I always say that I'll get back to a usual schedule, but it was my birthday week. So I get a little slack. I turned twenty, by the way :3 Anywho... back to the sad, depressing, horrible life of Bella Swan.

**Seven: The Beginning of the End**

**B**ella didn't exactly wake up the next morning. Not all the way at first. Her eyes were too heavy to lift, but her mind was too restless to stay silent. And so, she felt her consciousness awake first. For a time after that, she could hear nothing but the muttering of familiar voices, echoing off of the far walls of unseen hallways. Footfalls that softly paced with worry along creaky old floors. And the slow, uneasy breathing of the room around her. Where was she? There was no background noise of a hospital, no static of a television from her living room. So where? After a long, dark silence, Bella opened her eyes.

The only light in the black room she lay in came from a small candle holder, which flickered softly within the shadows. The room that she was in was an old room for sure. The wood of the walls were decrepit and rotting, the floor covered in a thick layer of dust. Still examining her surroundings, Bella's eyes lead her to a small structure beside her. It was a stand holding an upside down blood pouch, a little machine pumping small squirts into her arm by the minute. The other pouch it held was clearly an IV drip, and was fed through her hand. Bella's mouth was dry and tasted like cotton. Her eyes were puffed out, and her stomach still crawled with hunger. Thankfully, her head had been propped up with two pillows, else she wouldn't have had the strength to look and see that her door was open a jar. After a moment, a figure gently made her way inside.

"Hello dear," came Esme's kind voice. The candle light flickered against the outlining of her soft body, her eyes woeful and sympathetic. She walked forward and laid her cold hand on Bella's forehead. "Good... your fever's broken. You had us quite worried." As Esme checked Bella's IV and blood pouches, Bella kept her eyes on her form. A small woman, Esme had a true mother's heart. Though Bella hadn't the time to really get to know her, Edward's adopted mother always came off as the gentlest of creatures. Her hair always in a messy bun, her gold eyes doleful and innocent. Bella wondered, randomly, how such a sweet woman could have ended up loving such a stern man as Carlisle. But it made no difference. Esme turned back to Bella and sat on her bedside, taking her hand comfortingly. She tried to smile, but Bella could see the clear worry behind that mask. "I'm going to make you some food. I'm sure you're very hungry. Does beef stew sound all right?"

Bella opened her mouth, trying hard to talk. The only thing that came out was a cracked groan. Esme pet her cheek. "Don't speak, dear. Just nod yes or no." She nodded. "Good then..." Esme ran her thumb along Bella's temple, allowing a wave of calm to spread over her body. Like morphine. Bella suddenly felt extremely tired, but managed to raise her hand to Esme's to stop her. The vampire blinked in surprise, but took her hand away. Bella let her cracked lips close and open, that horrible mucus taste swelling within her mouth. But she ignored it for now. Instead, she mustered up all her strength to actually speak.

"Where... is Edward?" she croaked. Esme's face twisted with sadness as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"He's hunting at the moment, dear." Despite her good intentions, Bella could spot her lie. "Don't worry about him." He was blaming himself. Bella knew he was. He was off somewhere, wallowing in his own shame and loathing. She wanted to protest, but had no more strength to speak. Esme stood then, still holding her hand. "You just wait here. I'll be back soon enough with some stew. You'll need strength." With another pet to her temple, Esme left her.

The whisper of her footsteps faded the farther she got, leaving Bella with an overwhelming sense of loneliness. Gingerly, she dragged herself up to a sitting position, letting her head rest against the windowless wall behind her. Her eyes were now able to see the floor beside her bed. Somehow, they had been able to retrieve her things. Her unopened suitcases and backpacks set up neatly in a corner of the room. The camera, given to her by Edward himself, lay cold on the table beside it. Woozy, she had to close her eyes for a moment more before she could settle her body again. Before she knew it, Esme was back with a bowl of hot beef stew. Only this time, she had a few other faces trailing behind her.

"Hey kiddo," came the ever up beat voice of Emmett Cullen. Though he wasn't as cheerful as he might have been under the circumstances. Beside his big body, Rosalie stood, her pale hand clutching his large forearm. Rosalie had the sort of body that women in old paintings had. Rounded, supple and exquisitely beautiful. Only her constant frown of worry stopped her from being completely celestial. And in front of them both sat the little, scrawny boy of Jasper. Fourteen, but raised to have the mind of a child, Jasper's big eyes were watering in the middle of his gray, ashen face. His dark pigment had been drained long ago the day he was turned, having been a young slave in his human life. The minute they all stepped inside, Jasper took off from where he was and threw himself onto Bella, hugging her tightly around the middle. Bella blinked in surprise, and softly pat his head.

Esme rubbed his back after setting the stew down on the tray beside her. "Don't hurt her, Jasper. She's still healing." Sniffing, Jasper pulled away only to curl up beside her like a lost puppy, hugging her arm. Emmett smiled sadly as he and Rosalie approached her, his large, shovel like hand going to squeeze her shoulder.

"Sorry you couldn't come back to us under better circumstances," he said kindly. Bella only nodded, still not being able to regain her voice, and brought her bowl of stew to her lap. She was sure that the stew was good on its own, but for someone who hadn't eaten in over three days, it was heavenly. With shaky hands, she was able to carefully feed herself little spoonfuls. "On the bright side, at least we found you in time. Any longer and you might have been – "

"Emmett," Rosalie snapped in a hush. There was an awkward moment between them all, but Bella didn't particularly care about semantics at this point. The more she sat up eating, the more she was able to gain back at least a little strength. She swallowed a chunk of beef before wiping her mouth with the back of her wrist.

"What happened to Alec?" A cold front fell over the room. At the mention of that name, no one dared even speak. That is, until yet another voice joined the conversation.

"He left the country yesterday." The others didn't turn as Carlisle entered the room. They probably already heard him coming. The man stepped into the light, his gold eyes a much darker shade than the others. Other than that, everything on him was either white or pale, including his blond hair. Carlisle walked forward, the others clearing a path for the doctor, and he put a thermometer in her mouth. "He left the country just a day after you went missing. I've informed the Volturi of what has happened, and they'll deal with him accordingly." Standing, Carlisle double checked her pouches and then removed the thermometer. "Back to normal it looks like."

Bella didn't blink, staring up at him. "Will he get away with it?" This question caused even Carlisle to hesitate. Esme carefully took hold of his arm, her eyes full of concern. After a moment, Carlisle put the pen back in his pocket.

"I don't know," he said honestly. Esme let her head droop, none of the others even able to look Bella in the eyes. "As much as I wish I could tell you different, there's nothing we can do about this. It's out of our hands."

A sudden wave of injustice flew over her. Her lips parted, and her insides twisted and tied in the most painful ways. "You mean... you're not even going to try – ?"

"There's nothing to try. Alec is a Volturi. Vampire royalty. And with us being Peace Keepers, we can't so much as send a complaint."

His blunt words were enough to make Bella physically flinch. It took a moment to really register, but after that second of numbness was over, a new misery began to settle over her. Seeing her eyes well to tears, Jasper sat on his knees and hugged her shoulders. She returned it weakly, glad to have at least some form of comfort. No matter how little it might have been. The others took this as their cue to excuse themselves, Esme turning away before her own tears could show.

"Bella." Carlisle's new, tender tone drew her attention back up to him. For the first time, Carlisle's stern and pointed face looked... human, to put it plainly. His eyes were sympathetic, his features softened and sad. "There's something else. Jasper, if you please?" The boy didn't want to, but he begrudgingly obliged and left the two of them alone. "Believe me when I say I don't want to tell you this. But I can't give you back to your father just yet."

Bella sniffed, rubbing her tears away with the heel of her palm. "Why?" she asked wretchedly. There was yet another stifling pause.

"Because you may be pregnant."

Bella's body froze over. Had she heard that right? Surely there was some misunderstanding. "That... h-how is that... no..."

Carlisle raised his hands to take hold of hers, trying to calm her down. "We don't know for sure. It's just a possibility. Alec is a genetic vampire, remember. He was born that way. Which means he can reproduce, unlike us."

Tears were now pouring down Bella's face without restraint. Her face was twisted in terror and misery. Reaching up, she gripped her oily hair, trying to stop herself from hyperventilating. Carlisle gripped her shoulders. "Calm," he said quietly. "Take a breath... Easy now." Oddly, Carlisle was able to get her to settle before she could be sent into hysterics. When her head lifted back up, Carlisle took out a cloth and wiped her tender, red eyes.

"We don't know for sure," he continued. "There have only been a few instances of vampire and human blood mixing. It's a rare thing. So you have just as much chance of not being pregnant at all. We just need to see, all right?"

"H-how soon will I know?"

"A typical pregnancy test won't detect it," he said. "So I have sent a sample of your blood to the lab at the hospital. I know what to look for in the results." An odd moment transpired then. A sweet moment, mind. A moment that Bella needed, but odd none the less. Like a father consoling his daughter, Carlisle brought Bella into a hug. It was a bit awkward, as Carlisle's body was stiff and wooden, but Bella could feel his intentions. His regret and his guilt. Those long, thin fingers went up to her hair and he pressed her there.

"I'm sorry," he heard him say. Bella's tears replenished then, but for a different reason. "I'm sorry, Bella. This should never have happened to you." Tilting her head to look at the back of his, she softly pat the lower end of his back before he pulled away. "Finish your food," he said, standing quickly. Still strong and poised, Carlisle turned from her, his silhouette blocking most of her candle light. "You'll need your strength."

Without a glance back at her, he was gone.

I swear, I'm not secretly depressed! I blame the _Dead Island_ trailer music... By the way, are some of you having trouble with your email alerts? Last time I posted, I didn't get an email conformation... Just wanted to see if it was me.

Reviews so that I know who's still reading!

~T.


	8. Life As We Know It

Hey everyone! So during the past week, I've caught up on a few of my movies... Saw _Thor_ later than everyone else but... whew... I'll tell you one thing. I want Chris Hemsworth for my birthday X3

**Eight: Life As We Know It**

**F**or a week or so, Bella was kept to bed rest in the Cullen household. She was fed often enough, and only had a concept of night and day through the sleep schedules of the others. It vaguely reminded Bella of when she was kidnapped by Victoria, though far less hostile. She was visited often, checked up on, helped to the bathroom and so on (why they even had a bathroom was strange enough, but Bella didn't complain). Half way through the week, Bella was strong enough to sit up. By the end, she was able to stand and move without assistance. Though not without pain. It would come in small, short bursts at random intervals. Sharp at first, but duller later on. They would throb from between her legs up into her stomach and lower stomach, making her clench her teeth until it was over. Thankfully, Carlisle had plenty of pain medication to spare, and there was always Esme's abilities, just incase. She was a constant visiter to her bedside, as well as Jasper, who barely left it. Emmett often brought her books or snuck her in sweets, and Carlisle and Rosalie came in to check her vitals. Even Alice's gaunt face was seen peeking through the door from time to time, silently watching the human girl in a house full of vampires.

The only one who never came to her side was Edward.

Of all the times she needed him, all the times she just wanted him to be there for her, he was gone. Absent. Whenever she asked for him, it was one lie after another. He was hunting. He was scouting. He was making sure that the house was safe. When Bella finally demanded to see him, it was confessed to her that Edward wasn't even in the house. The day after Bella was found, he had left. To find Alec. This added a whole new layer of worry onto her already stressed body. It was enough to actually make her sick, and did a couple of times. What if he tried to do something drastic? What if he failed and wound up dead because of her? She could only imagine what the Volturi would do to him if he was caught. Victoria's death flew through her mind and she clutched the blankets to her chest.

Outside the Cullen home, things weren't much better. She had convinced Alice to tell her what was going on in town, and the answer was something Bella wasn't ready for in the slightest. Bella had been labeled as a missing person. Charlie and a group of others were working tirelessly to try and find her, including working with the railroad company and the California state police. Bella felt an undying and unrelenting sadness for her father. With how many times Bella either had gone completely missing, had been hurt, or nearly died, she was shocked that Charlie's hair wasn't completely white. She could just imagine her father, up every night, fruitlessly searching for his daughter, all the while Bella was being kept just out of reach, and just under Charlie's nose. But no matter how much she pleaded, Carlisle would not allow her to return home. Not yet.

This brought her to her other underlying fear. The fact that she could be pregnant with Alec's baby. The idea that a rapist could have impregnated her was bad enough, but a vampire rapist? What kind of baby would that even be? Horrible images went through her mind. Vile and gruesome images of some half demon, born with it's father's evil eyes. Piercing into her every day of its life... No. No, Bella would not let it get that far. If it turned out that she was pregnant, she would have it removed. Immediately.

If only she had Edward to lean on. It was bad enough that she had to go through this, but having to go through this practically alone? She had the rest of the family, yes. But Edward was her love. Her dear heart... If only he was here, then a little bit of pain might wash away from it all. Not everything, but something.

Because the others were awake during the night, Bella found herself sleeping during the day. But nearing the end of the first week, she found that she couldn't sleep. She tossed and turned, even stood to pace her room. Her body did not become tired. Outside, she could hear the pitter patter of rain against the old, wooden house. Her footsteps echoed off the hallow walls, being the only noise throughout the manor. A chill ran up her arms and she clutched them, keeping her eyes on the dark wood around her. That's when she heard a stumbling at the front door.

Quick as she could, she went out into the hall just as the front door closed. A weak and sopping Edward stumbled inside, gripping his arm and leaning against the wall. Bella paused, watching him. He was exhausted. He needed sleep. He was starting to make his way to his room, when he stopped and chanced a look up. They made eye contact. Through the dark corridor, Bella could see that regret and shame lingering in his dark gaze (had he not been feeding?). His face twisted into one of sorrow and he let his head hang. Bella turned and went into her room. When she came back out, she wrapped a blanket around his wet shoulders. Edward nearly withdrew from her, but did not, and instead allowed himself to be lead back to her room, where the two sat together. The bags beneath his eyes were deeper now, his face even more worn and tarnished than before. He leaned against her as she dried his hair with her blanket. Bits of water dropped to the floor, silently.

"I tried," he said after a while. "I tried so hard... That... that rat _bastard_... he fled..."

"I know," came Bella's response. A tense silence filled the room. "Did you follow him out to sea?"

Edward hesitated, but nodded. "Vampires are weak when they're over large bodies of water... I didn't stand a chance..." Yet another silence followed this. Unable to look Bella in the eye, Edward curled forward, putting his forehead in his hand in misery. Bella could do nothing but curl up against him, gripping his arm. He let himself wade in agony for a moment longer before lifting himself up and embracing Bella with his wet arms.

"Tell me if you get cold," he muttered. Indeed, his already chilled body was ten times colder now that he was wet. Still, Bella said nothing. The fact that he was hear was enough to make her put up with the chilly embrace. But Edward could tell that his hug did more bad than good and laid her down, removing himself and leaving to dry himself off and get another blanket for Bella. After changing himself and wrapping her up in a comforter, Edward started a fire (she hadn't noticed the hearth until a couple days in) before sitting beside her. Bella watched the orange flames dance about, making the room seem warm and comforting. As she laid like a cocooned caterpillar, Edward laid behind her, wrapping his arms around her middle, the blanket between them. She could hear his slow breath behind her, feeling the regret waft up from his body. Bella sighed.

"Please don't blame yourself for what happened," she finally said. "It's not your fault. You didn't do this to me."

Edward's arms tightened slightly. "No... But I could have strangled the one who did."

"There's nothing you can do."

"You've accepted that?"

Bella was silent, considering his question. After a moment, she brought his cool hand to her lips, kissing it. "No," she admitted. She turned to him, letting the tips of their noses touch. "Go to sleep," she said. "You need it." She touched part of his arm. Apparently, he was having a hard time healing. This made her frown. "Do you need blood?"

"I'll hunt tonight."

"But human blood will help you..."

"Bella, stop." His eyes were firm. "I'm not taking an ounce from you. Not a spec. You need every drop to heal yourself. I'll be fine with deer blood tonight." After a moment, he let out a sigh and closed his eyes, pushing his nose into her neck. The smell seemed to pacify him. "I'll go to sleep if you do." Bella considered this, but nodded, curling into his arms and chest. Slowly, the crackling of the fire and the soft breath passing his lips put her to sleep.

Her slumber was dreamless, thankfully, and she awoke feeling a great deal better, but still not exactly "good." Still, she awoke in the arms of her lover. That counted for something. Raising her finger, she pushed away a strand of hair from his face. Edward didn't so much as twitch. He must have been terribly tired. She could only imagine what Alec did to him. Sighing, she placed a kiss on the tip of his cold nose.

A knock came from the doorway. Bella looked up to see Carlisle standing in the shadow of her dwindling fire. His eyes lingered on the sleeping Edward before he turned back to Bella. He showed her a paper that he clutched in his hand. "I got your blood results back." Bella sat up, gripping the blanket tightly. Carlisle didn't continue right away. Instead, he walked forward and pulled up a chair to sit in. "I'd... show them to you but you wouldn't be able to make heads nor tails of them." He tilted his gold eyes upward. "Bella... I want you to know that despite the past's dangers, you have been considered family by many of us. Even me – "

"Just tell her already." Edward sat up, his eyes nervous, his hand around Bella's waist. So he hadn't been asleep then? Bella gripped his hand before turning back to Carlisle. Normally, Edward would have gotten a good lecture for snapping at his father, but this time, there was no room for such a scolding. Carlisle took a breath and flipped it open. As if he needed to see it again.

"You're carrying Alec's baby, Bella."

Bella felt a little bit of her crumble away inside. But she would not let this destroy her. Though her lip quivered and her throat clenched, she remained as strong as she could. "I want an abortion," she said immediately. "I don't want it, Carlisle. I want it out."

Carlisle closed his eyes, taking a long breath through his nose. "I'm sorry. I can't give you one."

Bella's face began to fall into desolation. Can't...? No... No, that wasn't right. This was her back up plan. Not all hope was lost, there was always an abortion! She didn't have to... carry this... this...! "Why?" she asked, her voice cracking.

He laced his fingers together. "This is not a normal, human fetus, Bella. This is a fetus with vampire blood. And it is determined to be born. It has attached itself to you so that..." His voice trailed off. Bella could feel Edward's hand tighten on hers. Carlisle continued. "If I were to kill it, I would kill you in the process."

Those words were like the floodgates. Once they had been said, Bella's whole world began to deteriorate. Her mouth gaped helplessly, her heart pounding in her head. This wasn't happening... This wasn't right! She needed to go back to school! She'd missed orientation, but she could talk to the dean and still get in! She needed to go back to her family! Charlie was worried sick! There had to be some other way out... But quickly, Bella realized that there was none. This caused her to let her tears fall, her body quake, and her emotions go. Hysterically, she began to sob, a hand going to her mouth. It was hopeless. Helpless. There was no way out of it. Not even a chance at this point. Edward hugged her around the shoulders, but that only made her sob louder, her mouth wide open. She was like this for a good ten minutes, until her body was tired, and her mind was foggy. Even after her screaming was over, Bella could do nothing but whimper into Edward's chest. His hand gently pet the back of her hair, saying nothing in the process.

"There's more," came Carlisle's voice.

Here, Edward did say something. "Oh goddamn it... Can't you see she's been through enough!"

"She needs to _know_." Edward clearly wanted to say something more, but was silenced. After a moment, Bella lifted her head up, her hand wiping at her puffy, red eyes. Carlisle sighed. "When the time comes... a human will not be able to withstand the birthing process."

That was a low blow at this point. She sniffed and rubbed her face. "S-so what? I'm damned if I do and d-damned if I don't?"

Carlisle rubbed his hands together. "Not necessarily. You see... There is a way for you to survive. But... In order for you to live, you would have to die."

At first, Bella had no idea what he meant. But Edward seemed to. "No," he snapped. "Absolutely not. Carlisle, that's... we can't – !"

"We must," said Carlisle sadly. "At the final stage of the pregnancy, you must become a vampire, Bella. Any sooner and the child will stop growing, and you will be perpetually pregnant. Any later, and you may die for good."

Bella felt her heart sink. As though it couldn't get any worse... Now she would have to leave humanity all together. Bella had no words for this. No begging and bartering, no helpless pleads. She was just... burned out. She laid her head against Edward's shoulder, crying and whimpering against him. He clutched her tightly, and Bella could tell he was trying to keep it together for her sake. At another time, she might have stopped crying so that he could feel better. But now... it little mattered. Edward kept her as comforted as he could, while Carlisle stood and left the room.

Bella's tears ran until there were no more left.

And here is how we put the original plot into motion in a dramatic and much more sensible way 8D

~T.


	9. Sympathy

Yes, yes, yes, I'm so sorry I didn't update on time... again. But you see, I just moved back to San Diego from Los Angeles, and I was able to plug my PS2 in for the first time in years and... she was so lonely without me, you see... T.T Well, this chapter was worth waiting for anyway :3 Remember how we were never told about Rosalie's past?

**Nine: Sympathy**

"**L**et me see Carlisle."

Esme blinked up from where she sat, her fingers fiddling with a small weaving loom she apparently had as a human. Being around for so many years left a good amount of free time on her hands. Currently, she was putting together a new blanket. Probably for Bella. Not that she'd need it after she was dead. She and Rosalie were in the living room, the blond helping her adoptive mother with the blanket. Working at a slow, human pace was refreshing for the vampires, and let them relax and breathe. Or in this case, take their minds off of everything that was going on at present. Bella could only wish that she had such an option. Esme stood, setting her wool to the side, and approached Bella. "What for?" she asked gently.

"I want to see my father again," said Bella sternly. "I know I shouldn't. I'm as good as dead anyway. But I don't care. I want to see him before I die."

A depressed look came over Esme's face, her hands cupping together against her stomach. "Oh... well, Bella, he's not here right now. He's out hunting with the others – "

"For how much longer?"

"Bella, dear." Esme stepped forward, taking Bella's cheeks with her chilly hands. "Please don't. It isn't easy for him to keep you here. He wants you to see your father just as much as you do. But it will just make things harder for you in the end?"

Bella turned from her, glaring at the floor. It wasn't right of her to be mad at Esme. Sweet and caring Esme, who cared for her like a mother. But she couldn't help it. She had asked Carlisle once before and was told no, but after two weeks of doing nothing but resting, trapped in a home that cared for her but was no better than a prison, Bella had grown restless and irate. She wanted to return to her home. Wanted to see Charlie's mustache waver with surprise before it turned up in a smile. Wanted to see all of her friends one last time. Perhaps have a movie marathon, or go to a party, or shop at Port Angeles... All the things she had before, she wanted them again. She never realized just how precious those moments were. If she had any real foresight into what would become of her life, she would have taken advantage of every second she had living. Now that she was forbidden from ever experiencing them again, she felt that her life was so waisted. All those times she could have had fun, but decided not to. All those little fights and disagreements over silly nothings that in the end caused her to laugh and become even closer to her friends. She wanted them all again. So to hear that not only would she be said no to again, as well as being told not to even ask, was frustrating.

Esme seemed to sense her disappointment and brought her into a hug, which Bella did not return. Her fingers pet the thick of her hair, and her lips found their way to Bella's temple. "I'm so sorry, dear. It isn't fair. I – "

But Bella would not hear of it. She turned sharply and made her way back to her room. Her eyes had gotten so used to the dark now. She doubted if she could even recall what the sun felt like. Her hand subconsciously went to her arm, trying to imagine a soft ray of light falling on it. The warmth of it against her skin. This only made her more depressed and she shut the door behind her.

Since getting her strength back, Bella had a few changes made to her room. She had a mirror now, and a hairbrush and toothbrush at her bedside. In reality, it just gave her something to do. Bella's eyes stared at the morbid reflection in front of her, the firelight of her hearth flickering against her face. Her eyes were sallow and had heavy bags beneath them. Though she was eating regularly, it felt as though she had lost weight. Her gaze traveled to her stomach in the mirror. She wasn't showing yet, at least according to everyone else. Yet every time Bella stared at her stomach, she could swear that she could see it. Throbbing, growing, sucking her dry of her energy and life. If only she had the will to kill herself...

Sighing, she sat herself on her bed, listening to the fire crackle in front of her. For a long while, she was left alone. But soft footsteps alerted her to the door. Blinking, she looked up, her lips parted just so in surprise. Rosalie stood there, leaning awkwardly against part of the frame. Her gold eyes were sympathetic and pitying. Bella felt great insult at her empathy and turned away, bringing her knees to her chest. She was sick of being the victim. Sick of being looked at as such a helpless creature. It made her all the more resentful.

Bella buried her face in between her knees, as if that would make Rosalie go away. But instead, the bed beside her depressed, a second shadow accompanying her own. Bella remained still, but when it failed to drive Rosalie away, she lifted her head, her eyes on the vampire beside her. Rosalie had her hands on her legs, her eyes on the firelight. Her face, strangely like Carlisle's, was unreadable. Yet not as firm or cold. Just... blank.

"I'm sorry," she finally said. Bella turned away. The last thing she needed was another gushing apology for this.

"It's not your fault," said Bella with a hint of bitterness.

Rosalie paused. "No," she said. "It's not." Bella looked over her kneecap to see that Rosalie was turned to her. "But that doesn't mean I'm not sorry. I know your pain, Bella."

Bella felt a flair of indignity at this sentence. She knew her pain? Hardly. No one knew Bella's pain. No one knew the thoughts of suicide that slid into her mind almost every day. No one knew her horrible isolation in this house of the dead. No one knew what it was like to be kept from almost everyone and everything she'd ever loved as she waited for the end of her mortal life. Bella glared at the fire, as though it was its fault, and brought herself into a ball. "What do you know about it?" she finally growled. Rosalie once more took her time with this. Bella chanced a look over to the vampire, who was back to staring at the fire as well.

"Because it happened to me too."

That made something click in Bella's mind. Slowly, Bella's bitter resentment began to slip away. Like grains of sand through open fingers. Her scowl slid into a face of sudden understanding, and she sat up beside her. Bella took in that silent face for a moment more before turning back to the flames. "Were you raped as a human?"

Bella saw Rosalie nod from out of the corner of her eye. "It was different... of course. It wasn't a vampire. So I guess it wasn't nearly as bad. But... it involved someone I knew. Someone who I thought I could trust...

"...I was in college at the time. It was 1924. I'll remember that winter until the day I die for good. I was only twenty two, and going to a girl's university in Colorado. The night it happened, I was going out to meet a friend of mine. Tom Wallace. He went to the boy's university across the way..."

The dormitory for the female students was alight this evening. It was, after all, a Friday night. Young men were picking up their dates for an evening of dancing and romancing. All while the house mother glared at their tail lights as they drove off for the night, of course. Up near the top left corner of the building, a figure sat before a vanity mirror, a comb going through her long, blond hair. Odd for the time; most girls her age sported fashionable bobs and short cuts. But Rosalie Harold didn't care much for the fashion of the day. As she braided her hair for the night, her roommate, Susan Samson laughed her way into the room, her own black hair in one of said hairstyles beneath a cute hat that wrapped around the back of her head like turtle shell. As she stumbled inward, she began taking off her school coat, shoes and stockings, switching them for a much more party worthy outfit. She turned her eyes to Rosalie's blue ones, smiling from ear to ear.

"Hey sister!" Laughing, Susan wrapped her ungodly thin arms around Rosalie's neck. "Me and the other girls were going out boozin' tonight. Why don't you come with us, Rosie?"

"Sue, you're going to get caught one of these days." Rosalie put her brush aside and began to tie up the end of her braid. "Besides, we have midterms this week. Do you really want to be smashed for your test?"

"Ah! You're no fun, Rosie!" She swayed her from side to side before picking up the end of her braid. She clicked her tongue. "When are you going to get this horse tail cut? It's so old fashioned."

"I like it this way."

Pouting, Susan stood and put her hands on her hips. "What you need is a little more dazzle in your life." She turned and began to put on her own makeup. "Well if you feel like swinging by the jazz club later tonight, we'll be there."

After a little more light talk, Susan and Rosalie went their separate ways. Rosalie was picked up by a young man in quite a flashy new car. Tom Wallace, a slick young fellow with brown hair combed back with grease, and a suit and tie for the occasion. He grinned as Rosalie set herself in the passenger's seat. "Well well," he said brightly. "Is this you dolled up, sugar?"

"We're just going to the library," said Rosalie simply. She had on a simple coat over her ankle-length dress. Sure, the other girls thought she was an old maid, but Rosalie paid no attention to that. Studies were her number one priority, and she kept it that way through her years there. Tom frowned slightly but shrugged his shoulders.

"All right," he said. Turning his wheel, he pulled out, his headlights reflecting in the glittery snow. Tom had known Rosalie from that summer. She had a temporary job as a secretary, and he as a delivery boy. Since then, they found out that their colleges were practically right next door to each other, and they soon became friends. That night, Tom had asked for Rosalie's help on a report he was doing for a class project. As she was always ahead in her school work, Rosalie agreed to help. They arrived at the library, but Tom did not get out after parking. Instead, he leaned against his seat, a little smile on his face, as he looked Rosalie over. Rosalie stared back, a little confused as to why they weren't going in. But before she could ask, Tom spoke. "You know... have I ever told you you're damn pretty?"

Rosalie blinked in surprise, a little blush on her cheeks. "Tom... you know I don't like that language."

"Ah!" He waved it aside. "Come on, Rosie. Can't you just take a compliment?"

A little embarrassment fell on her and she stared at her knees. "Thank you." A silence followed. Rosalie glanced at him after a moment and turned to her door. "Well.. we'd better get going – "

But Tom had put a hand on her door, stopping her from leaving. A little shock hit her and she turned back around. Tom was smirking. "What's the rush? It doesn't close for another hour. Besides... I finished my project two days ago."

Rosalie blinked in surprise. "Then what are we doing here?"

"Well what do you think?"

Rosalie stared at him, unsure of what to think, to be quite honest. But the closer he got towards her, the more fearful she became. She turned away and tried opening the door, but Tom grabbed her by the shoulder. Spinning her around, he kissed her. Hard. Rosalie's eyes widened and she ripped away. "Tom!" He didn't stop to listen. Instead, he brought her in close, pinning her to the seat and kissing her again and again while she squirmed. "T-Tom!"

"Ah, come on Rosalie!" He took her wrists. "You've been leading me on this whole time! What did you think was going to happen? Now come on..." He kissed her. "Let's just have some fun, Rosie..." Rosalie struggled and squirmed, her eyes wide with horror. Finally, after getting one of her hands free, she slapped him hard across the face. He cried out in surprise, and only grabbed her tighter. But this caused Rosalie to fight even more. Finally, she was able to kick him off, yank open the door, and run.

Her feet froze from the snow, but she didn't care. She focused her entire containment of energy on getting away. Getting away to safety. Getting back home. Unfortunately, it didn't take long for headlights to flash behind her. She quickly ran into a side street and down and alley, only to come across a dead end. Panicked, she tried climbing up a wobbly fire escape. The snow on the steps made it far too slippery, and she fell and flopped onto a pile of old boxes and snow. By the time she had lifted herself up, Tom's car was already blinding her with light, the sound of his door slamming echoing through the alley. Frozen with fear, she could do nothing but scream before his hand came over her mouth...

"...I couldn't move for a little while after that. Some time, around one in the morning, I was sure I was going to freeze to death. But then, Carlisle found me out of pure luck. I couldn't go back. I couldn't face a single person after what Tom had done. And so Carlisle gave me an opportunity."

"To become a vampire?"

Rosalie hesitated, her eyes going to her hands. "That's part of it." Those long fingers began to curl into fists, her gaze becoming darker. "The other part was to kill that son of a bitch with my bare hands. I found him a month later, after I'd been turned. Waited till he was alone. Then, I ripped open his chest and let him bleed to death. Slowly." Bella said nothing more, letting Rosalie regroup herself after bringing back those memories. Of all the people to take revenge... Bella didn't think that Rosalie would be one of them. Rosalie flipped her eyes back up to Bella. "Listen Bella. I know it's hard right now. I know you're angry and alone. But it gets better."

Bella laid her cheek against her knees, looking at her with soft eyes. "How did it get better for you?"

A little smile came to her face and she turned back to the fire. "I met Emmett...

"We were in Chicago at the time. This was right after Annabell. Carlisle thought that it wasn't healthy for Edward to stay that place much longer. So, he moved us there. One night, I took a stroll to collect my thoughts, when I found him..."

It had been almost thirty years to the day since Rosalie said goodbye to human life. December, 1954. Winters in Chicago were harsher than in Forks, possibly because of the more urban setting. The snow couldn't collect charmingly along the tops of forest trees. Instead, it was reduced to fall on street lamps and sidewalks, creating brown mush on corners and in gutters. It was yet another Friday night. As humans around her bundled up to get warm and get inside, Rosalie walked with only a light jacket on, her feet barely feeling the snow through her boots. She let out a sigh, her warm mouth making a cloud of hot breath in front of her. What to do tonight? She began to think up different plans for the evening. That's when she heard music coming from off in the distance.

It started off as a drum beat. For a split second, she was reminded of the jazz she grew with in the twenties. But walking closer, she noticed a difference in the beat. It was more... lively, more robust with energy than jazz. Yet so similar. She walked closer to a club of some kind, and slipped herself in. Dancers between the ages of fifteen to twenty nine were everywhere. Skirts flying, hair flopping, arms pumping like crazy. Well that was another change; flappers didn't dance nearly this hard, let alone with partners. Some of them went so far to even throw their dates between their legs or up in the air. What _was_ this kind of dancing? Whatever it was, it got blood pumping, making the air so tantalizingly sweet that Rosalie was close to salivating. But she restrained herself.

She migrated her way over to a drink table, her eyes skimming the crowd. No real reason except that she had nothing else planned for the night. She landed on someone in the middle of the floor. A boy – no, a man, more like. He was tall, with broad shoulders and huge arms. On his thick neck was a charming face and dazzling smile, and despite his mass, his feet were lighter than any dancer Rosalie had ever seen. He swung with the band, twirling and tossing his girl like a rag doll, yet with more grace than she ever knew anyone to have, let alone a hulk of a man like him.

"Enjoying yourself?" Rosalie jumped as a voice came from beside her. Looking up, she saw a thin man with pointed features grinning at her. He wore a business suit, his thinning hair slicked sleazily. "I see you're admiring my prize pony." He gestured to the dance floor at the man Rosalie was just eying. "Are you a fan?"

"Fan?" Rosalie repeated. "Of what?"

The man blinked in surprise. "What...? You mean you don't know Emmett Two Step Trenton? He's on television all the time!"

Rosalie frowned in thought, turning back to the dancer. "Dancing?"

That made the man laugh loudly, Rosalie flaring at his attitude. "Boxing, baby doll! He's only the number one contender for the middle weight championship! Come on, you've know!"

"No, I don't," Rosalie snapped. "Boxing is a brutal sport for backwards apes."

The man's eyebrows shot up, but it didn't take away his smile. "Well now... That's a bit of a harsh tone you got there, Miss Priss. Have you met any of these so called backwards apes?"

"No, and I don't plan to."

"Then how do you know?"

"You don't have to taste poison to know that it kills."

"Hey, Marty, how are we doing on time?"

A new voice had entered into the conversation. Rosalie didn't notice that a new song had started, and that the dancing boxer had left the floor to approach the two of them. But the minute she and the mystery man were face to face, Rosalie felt herself stunned by his mere presence. He was taller in person, and his blood had yet to cool from his dancing, pumping like hot honey just below that thick skin of his. She was entranced, her eyes on his jugular, watching it jump from each throb of his heart. But again, she recalled her self discipline and turned her eyes back up to the man, who seemed just as taken with her, but for different reasons.

From behind her, the man spoke. "We're doing just fine, Em. You've got a few good hours before I force you to bed." Noticing the fact that Emmett and Rosalie were staring at each other, the man – Marty – edged Rosalie forward, a hand on her shoulder. "I've just been chatting up this lovely lady here. Well, miss? Say hello to the backwards ape."

Rosalie snapped a glare at him, shyness disguising itself as anger flaring up within her. Emmett spoke next. "Oh? Backwards ape, eh?"

Well, she was already outted. Might as well. Turning to Emmett, Rosalie put her hands on her rounded hips. "Boxing is just one step below primitive gladiator fights. I don't find entertainment in a couple of meat sacks beating each other to death."

Far from being put off, Emmett laughed. That laugh sent shivers up her spine. If Rosalie had to give it an adjective, she supposed she would have to call it... refreshing. Like waking up from a long dream to a bubbling brooke. He seemed to be a man of good spirits and natural decency. A gentleman disguising as a jester. His muscle bound arms folded, he looked down at Rosalie with amusement. "I take it you've never been to a fight before."

"I've never had the urge," she admitted honestly.

"Mm." Emmett's eyes grew interested, his smile handsomely coy. "Tell you what. I've got a big fight tomorrow. Give me your name, and I'll make sure you get a free seat. On me."

Rosalie scrunched up her face. "Why would I want to?"

Emmett's smirk became wider, his warm brown eyes twinkling. Taking Rosalie's hand, he brought it up to his lips and kissed her knuckles, his eyes on her the entire time. "Because it'll give you another excuse to see me again."

_What nerve!_ came Rosalie's first thought. _What – what absolute nerve! I won't be going anywhere near... anywhere near your... stupid... _Those thoughts began to trail off the longer her hand was held. She found herself transfixed on his face. The smell of his blood was strong enough to make her almost forget her convictions and self control. She swallowed what had gathered in her mouth and slipped her hand away. "Don't get your hopes up," she said coldly.

Again, Emmett laughed. He slid his hand away and gave her a two fingered salute. "I'll wait anyway." After blowing her a kiss, he turned and found a new date to start dancing with. Rosalie watched him from the shadows the entire night...

"You went, didn't you?" came Bella's question.

A little smile came to Rosalie's lips. "Of course I did. At the time, I convinced myself that it was just his blood. He was my type, you see. B Positive. It took me a while to realize that was only part of it. I went to the fight, loved it but didn't admit to it, and met him afterwards. It was there that he asked me out on a date.

"...What he saw in me, I'll never know. I was difficult to please and stiff as a board. I was having a hard enough time keeping Emmett a secret from Carlisle, so I did all I could to keep the relationship we had cold. I used my past as an excuse to stay away from him, as well as anything else I could think of. But he was persistent. He took me places, taught me to swing... Then came one summer date of 1955..."

The sky was clear enough to see the stars that night. The carnival downtown was in the middle of its boom season, filled in the daytime with families, and reserved at night for young couples in love. Booths of all kinds were set up along the streets, a couple of flimsy metal rides on either end of the strip. Music played from radios and open cars, a small open band playing a few tunes in a gazebo near by. In the center of it all, Emmett was getting himself ready to throw a baseball at a pyramid of metal milk bottles, Rosalie watching with mild interest. Rearing back, he threw the ball and hit the pyramid with ease, knocking down his targets. As a reward, he was given a stuffed animal, which he turned to hand to Rosalie. She took the plush dog in her hands before tucking it beneath her arm.

"You getting hungry at all?"

"I ate before I came."

Chuckling, Emmett put one hand in his pocket, the other on the small of Rosalie's back. Rosalie had tried to be as stiff as possible with their physical contact, but Emmett's charm eventually won her over. Now, he'd gone so far as even stealing a kiss or two. Though now, in these later months, Rosalie had to admit that it was growing easier to let him touch her. Yes, he was her dirty little secret as far as Carlisle was concerned. But even though she knew what involving yet another human would mean, Rosalie couldn't help but enjoying herself with him. Even though she didn't always show it. In fact, the more and more Rosalie spent time with Emmett, the more and more she was starting to realize she _liked_ him.

They were walking to the car when Emmett characteristically broke into a random chuckle. "You know... as long as we've seen each other, I've never taken you out to dinner."

Rosalie's heart gave a little jump. "You don't have to buy my meals," she said stiffly. "I'm fine on my own. My family feeds me before I go out."

"Mm." That seemed to end the conversation, as Emmett jumped onto a different topic. Rosalie felt a small wave of relief when she realized that he wouldn't press the matter. After all, how do you casually bring up the fact that you don't eat food?

They found their way to Emmett's car (a red hot Corvette) and hopped inside. Rosalie's stuffed prize took refuge in the backseat. Emmett pulled out of the parking lot, and headed down the street, back towards Emmett's apartment. Her mind began to fill with thoughts. She had heard rumors, yes. After all, athletes were notorious with women. She was warned ahead of time by other female admirers that he'd probably have someone else behind Rosalie's back. But if he did, he showed no signs of interest in other women, and most surprisingly, didn't try to make a move. Once or twice, he would offer her a place to stay. She always refused. Every time, he took her answer without fuss, and wished her a good night. That night showed signs of being the same.

"You're quiet." Rosalie jumped at his voice and whipped her eyes to him, stiffening out of habit. "Something on your mind?"

At that moment, a random thought came to Rosalie. Probably one that had been brewing all this time, even if she didn't know it. "I just... don't know what you see in me." Suddenly, her eyes found themselves staring out the window as they rolled up to a red light. "There are so many other girls you could be with right now."

Emmett laughed a bit. "That's true."

"So why aren't you?" Rosalie turned expectantly, her hands folded in her lap. _There are so many humans to choose from... why me?_ "Why do you keep seeing me?"

"Well, is there something wrong with you?" The red light changed to green, and Emmett continued on his way.

Rosalie couldn't quite answer that, and instead stared out in front of her. "Well... for starters, I haven't... said yes to any of your offers."

Emmett shrugged. "Ah, don't worry about that. You don't strike me as that type anyway." They glanced at each other and the boxer sighed. "You really don't get why I like you?" Rosalie shook her head. "Ok... One of the things I like is that you don't take any shi- uh, don't take guff from anybody. You're straight forward, you know what you want... Not to mention you're smoking hot. Chicks today are so... lame. No brain in their head, you know? You, baby, you're a barn burner, and I dig that. Makeup, short skirts, that's not your bag. Sure, some might call you a square but... Me, personally?" He slipped Rosalie a grin. "I got a thing for the old fashioned types."

Rosalie blinked at him. So... the reason most people avoided her was the reason he liked her? "Then why did you invite me over those times?"

"Ah hell, baby. I might dig the old fashioned types, but I'm still a dude." He turned around corner and continued on. "But, I figured you'd say no. You seem like the no-nookie-till-rings kinda girl." His smile became a little dimmer and he glanced to the side. Almost nervously. "There's uh... there's actually a little... Well, there's something I want to tell you." They came to another red light. Emmett wrapped his hands around the steering wheel, wringing the leather back and forth. "Uh... How many months have we been going now?"

Rosalie frowned slightly. "Since December... about six. Seven."

"Right..." Emmett cleared his throat. "Y'know how sometimes they say that... that you can see somebody and you know that... um... you know that they're... you know... you know?" He looked at her. "You follow?"

Rosalie stared at him blankly. "No."

Emmett nibbled at his lip, looking at his docile speedometer. "Well... uh, well... well... Sometimes... s'how I hear it, anyway. Sometimes you can see somebody and... it's sorta... in your head that they're..." His voice got a bit quieter and he shifted in his seat. "...right for you... or something."

"Do you mean love at first sight?"

"Kinda, I guess..."

A harsh silence followed this sentence. Rosalie felt a build up to what she knew he would say next. Her hands gripped the seat below her thighs as she waited. "Well..." He turned to her and smiled. "I think I'm in love with you, Rosie."

Rosalie didn't know what to say. Her mouth gaped like a fish, and her eyes widened helplessly. After a moment, she turned away, torn in half. On the one hand, Carlisle would be furious. If he knew about this little affair of theirs, he would move them away faster than Rosalie could blink. Not to mention it would just send Edward into another one of his depressions. A human's love and all that. But what really frightened her most about this was... she could barely contain how happy those words made her feel.

"Oh no..." came her first verbal response. She didn't have to look at Emmett to see the devastation on his face.

"Oh no?" he repeated. "What do you mean, 'oh no'?" The light had turned, on the count that they were moving again. Rosalie was too stunned to notice the world moving outside their car. "What... you mean... you don't feel the same? Don't you enjoy being with me?" Rosalie looked up, vulnerable for the first time in a long time. She wanted so badly to tell him that she did. That his assumption was wrong. That she liked being with him. No, that she _loved_ being with him! That being with him was the first time in her life that she had actually had _fun!_ That she didn't want that to end. That she wanted to be with him for as long as she possibly could. Even if she had to go to every smelly, sweaty fight that he was in, she would go with pleasure, if only to see him at the end of it! Her mouth trembled. "...I..."

A honk. A sudden jerk. A skid. Tire tracks. Screeching breaks. Had Rosalie been in any other state of mind, she would have gotten him out of there, safe from harm's way. She would have yanked open her door and tore from the car, Emmett safely in her arms. But she was too distracted. Too shocked. To _human_. All she could think to do was to throw herself on top of Emmett just as the other car collided with his side of the Corvette. The wails of the crumbling metal were the only things that rang in her ears. Emmett was too shocked to even cry out in pain. The headlights washed over them both, washing them out in complete white for only a split second. The horrified screams around them didn't even resinate until a moment or two more. But Rosalie paid them no mind. For her senses had gone into overdrive. As she pulled away from the man beneath her, she saw blood spilling over his shaking face. Her hunger began to rise, her fangs extending out of pure want. Just a taste... just one little taste...

But something inside her stopped those primal desires. Instead, she leaned forward, and merely clutched him, waiting in agony for the paramedics to arrive.

Rosalie stayed with him the entire way, holding his hand whenever she could. The first and last time she felt a raw sense of emotion was that cold winter's night thirty years prior. Not since then had she ever felt such a slate of fear. Fear that perhaps Emmett may not breathe another moment on this Earth. Finally, she was allowed to see him. She refused to leave his room, and instead shut the curtains tight enough so that she wouldn't have to. And there, she sat. And waited. Finally, just as the sun was rising, his eyes began to open. She was the first thing he saw.

"Rosie...?"

Rosalie leaned forward, touching his cheek. A head bandage sat around his crown, his brown hair disheveled and a brace on his neck. He blinked, hazy. "Did I die?"

She gave him a small smile. "No..." It faded soon after as she turned to the rest of him. Slowly, those eyes fell to his bottom half. That's when his face fell to horror, tears welling in his eyes. Both legs were in casts. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, before looking up to Rosalie, as if making sure that this was real. She could feel the pain coming from him, and looked down sympathetically. "Emmett, I'm so sorry..." Tears of her own began to bloom, and she turned back to the man she loved. Yes, loved. She would admit it, if only to herself. Leaning in, her lip trembling, she pet his hair in a caring way. "I heard... I heard the doctors talking. You might be able to... to walk again if you follow your physical therapy..."

Emmett's face contorted with unimaginable pain, his tears falling on either side of his face. He took in a breath to try and calm himself, but no luck. "But I have... the championship in... in just a week..."

His words cut her like a knife. But she couldn't not tell him. It was not her way. "Emmett." He managed to crack his eyes up at her. "You might be able to walk eventually but... but you'll never box again. Or dance. Or... or..." She couldn't go on. Her words choked within her as she saw Emmett start to cry. Not simply whimper and let the tears fall. He was sobbing. He tried baring his teeth, tried stopping himself, but it was no use. The truth was more than he could bare. Rosalie leaned in, clutching his shoulders and crying to his chest. This was her fault. She should have saved him... done _something!_ She had let him fall to this... and the way she saw it, she owed it to him now.

They cried together for a good hour, before the energy left them both. Rosalie let herself lament for a good half hour more before lifting herself above him. She pushed away his drying tears. "Emmett," she began, her voice trying hard to remain strong. "There's... something I need to tell you." He hiccuped, but remained silent. "But first know... that I can do something for you. Emmett, I can give you your legs back. You can – you can fight again, you can dance... I can _fix_ this, Emmett. But you have to promise me." She cupped his cheek, her hand squeezing his. "You have to promise me that you meant it when you said you loved me. No matter what secrets I hide."

Emmett stared up at her, almost as though he knew. He knew what she was saying, what she was hiding. His trembling hand squeezed hers back, and with that, he closed his eyes, agreeing to anything she had in mind. Rosalie leaned in, kissing him sweetly, before reaching up to remove his neck brace...

Bella and Rosalie sat in silence at the end of her story. The fire had just about gone cold, but neither cared to restart it. Rosalie turned to Bella with a small smile, visible through the dim light of the ambers. "In the end, it wasn't a perfect resolution. But we helped each other through our own fears. We still do to this day." Reaching forward, she took Bella's hand. "It seems hopeless now... but Edward will be strong for you. I know it."

The smallest of smiles came to Bella's face. She could tell it took a lot of courage for Rosalie to share herself like that. In a way, it helped her to let go of a little of her own stress. Not all of it, by a long shot, but some of it. That moment, she felt a strange, sisterly connection to her. So, reaching forward, she pulled Rosalie into a hug, silently thanking her. She broke it when her eyes landed on the doorway. Carlisle stood there, face blank as ever. The two parted, and Rosalie stood in his presence. Tilting his eyes down, Carlisle spoke shortly.

"I think it's time you see your father."

OHMIGODTHATWASLONGFORME. -faints- Yeah, yeah, I know. This was long, while meanwhile I'm writing 30 page chapters for my real books. Eh. Anyway. Yes, so, this was Rosalie's past. Whatdjya think? It's one of the things that I've been dying to write this book. Review so I know who's still there~!

~T.


	10. Returning Home

Jeebus... I just watched _The Elephant Man_ for the first time. You want depressing? Forget _Black Swan. _This shit will have you bawling.

**Ten: Returning Home**

**I**t was strange, going back to Forks. Her life had been changed so drastically during the past month – or had it been a year? – that Bella almost found it difficult to go back. She knew that it was a futile trip. Her fate had been sealed long ago. There was no point in returning. But she couldn't leave her life behind without seeing her father one last time. Without seeing her friends. She wanted to taste a freshly made apple pie again. Wanted to smell the morning grass after a fresh batch of rain had run over it the night before. She wanted to live one last time. It was nighttime at the moment, and Edward was carrying her above the trees, hopping from top to top, heading towards the home she was to leave by the end of the next month. Thirty days she would have in Forks until she was set to return to the Cullen home, permanently. There was already a plan set up in order to fake her death. To simply go missing again would be too much for the others to bare.

Edward landed gracefully in the oak tree just across from her home. The porch light was on. How late was it? How early? Bella's heart jumped into her throat as she quickly jerked her eyes towards the driveway. A sudden relief then replaced it as she saw the cruiser in its proper place. Her truck, empty and cold, sat beside it. This scene alone was enough to make her throat tighten. However, she kept her composure. Edward hopped into a shadow by the sidewalk, gently setting Bella down on her feet. She turned and smiled to him in thanks. It was a half hearted one at best. But Edward understood, and placed a cool kiss on her cheek. After one last, silent goodbye, Bella turned and walked forward, eyes locked on her old, screen door.

"Dad?" she called, almost feebly. It was silent in the house, though the light was on. She made it to the door, and peered in through the window. She could not see her father in the living room. The television was not on. Bella knocked, but no answer came. Just when she was about to reach for the hidden key beneath the mat, she realized that the door was opened slightly. Carefully, she edged the front door forward. It moaned softly at its hinges, but gave no other protest. A crinkle met her foot as she stepped inside. Papers. All sorts of papers were strewn upon the ground. Looking closer, she saw that it was police paperwork. Her name sat boldly on a top line, staring up at her.

Taking a breath, Bella continued inward. "Dad? Daddy, are you home?" Her voice echoed through empty rooms. Until, of course, she heard a faint snoring coming in from the kitchen. Silently as she could, Bella walked forward, and saw Charlie sitting at the kitchen table, his cheek laying flat against a row of papers and files. He was fast asleep, the bags beneath his eyes evident in the faint light above his head. Her face instantly filled with burning tears at the sight. She knew it. He never stopped looking for her, not once. Never paused for a moment of sleep. Always searching, always looking.

Bella had to stop herself from racing forward. Instead, she moved carefully and slowly, before kneeling beside her father, and gripping his knee. He showed no reaction, tired beyond belief, probably. After a moment or two, she stood and removed the pen from his loose fingers, her hand falling to the back of his head. "Daddy..." she whispered. Charlie's eyes began to flutter open.

There was a silence. His head lifted, a paper falling from his cheek after sticking there from the oil of his skin. Charlie Swan stared up at his daughter with disbelief and shock. Almost as though he did not believe it was real. Bella ignored her own tears as she smiled down at him, her hand cupping his rough cheek. "I'm home, Daddy," she said, her lower lip quivering. "I'm safe."

Without a second's pause, Charlie burst into tears of joy. Standing, he brought his daughter into his chest, crying against her shoulder. Bella squeezed with all her might. His body was warm. It melted her. She loved her father dearly. Sometimes, more dearly than herself, though she didn't exactly show it as often or as well as she should. Bella realized that now. She was determined to show him just how much he meant to her in the little time she had left. She swore it to herself.

They said very little that night. After the initial embrace, the two found themselves on the couch, Charlie unable to stop the onslaught of tears at the sight of his thought to be dead daughter, but he had grown quieter about them. Bella remained by his side until she heard his very light snoring. Bella looked up, seeing the sleeping face of her father. It was far more peaceful than before. Standing, she woke him up a second time only to get him to bed. Laying him down, Bella took off his boots and jacket, pulling a blanket up to his shoulders. As she tucked him in, his calloused hand touched hers. Bella paused and looked up to him, asking if he needed something. He didn't answer. Instead, he stared at her face, his lips parched and cracked.

"Please be real," was all he said. After that, his heavy lids finally dropped for good, and he was once more fast asleep.

Bella didn't go to her room right after. Because she was so used to sleeping during the day now, she sat on the edge of his mattress, holding his hand while he slept. He muttered slightly in his sleep, his fingers squeezing every now and then. Bella squeezed her hand right back. He had grown grayer since they last saw each other, especially around the edge of his scalp and his bushy mustache. Bella could remember loving to tug on it when she was a little girl. No matter where they went, Charlie always insisted that he give her a piggy back ride. She loved that more than anything else. To be high in the air, the sun on her face, her father's strong shoulders beneath her arms. They would get ice cream or watch movies or play all sorts of games in the park. All for hours on end, simply enjoying being together. All these wonderful memories... why now of all times did Bella decide to bring them up? She never realized how much time she truly had...

Her mind went back to the fights that they had in the past, and all the ways she could have avoided them. Had she ever made Charlie cry like that before? Had she ever made him feel inadequate? Unloved? An unfit father? Oh if she had, Bella would hate herself forever. She was lucky to have a man like that as her dad. If she had known then what she knew now, her life would be so different. She would have done so much. More importantly, she would have loved Charlie more than he ever deserved to be loved.

Charlie, who was always left in the dark about Bella's life. Charlie, who knew so little yet cared so much. Charlie, who only wanted Bella to be happy, even at the cost of his own happiness. Dear, silent Charlie, in the background. Helpless, but still always trying. Still always doing the best he could for as long as he could. Bella wished she could describe in words everything going through her head then. What could she ever do to make up for a man who had given her so much? Who had loved her unconditionally, and who had given her life?

Bella wiped her face with her spare hand, her other still clutched in her father's palm. That's when she noticed something. Something she hadn't seen in a very long time, it seemed. As she turned her head to the bedroom window, she noticed a gray blue change to the sky. Finally leaving her father's bed, Bella went to the back door that lead to the yard and stepped outside. The chilled morning air bit at every part of her body, but it barely registered. For as that gentle, innocent color began to spread, Bella could feel herself awaken. The sun was rising. For the first time in a month, she was seeing the sun.

Her feet began to take her from her home and back up into the wilderness. But she knew where she was going. The giant shadows and large trees did not scare her. Because she was following the sun. First, she was walking. Then, she broke into a run. She ran. As though she was going to miss the sun rise, she ran. Her legs pumped fire, her lungs nearly burst, but she could not stop herself. Finally, she skidded to a halt when she had no where else to go. She had reached a small cliff within the forest. Not large enough to die from, but big enough to see above the tree tops in front of her. And it was through these evergreen trees that she saw the sun start to rise.

It was slower than in most movies. There was no grand pinkness or celestial halo of light that one might see in a picture or painting. It was just... rising. The bluish gray began to bleed away the dark, spreading like slow, spilled ink. Bella spread her arms out to welcome the warmth, but none of it came. Not yet. She waited. It pushed its way through the pine needles, glowing brighter than anything she'd ever seen, until it had finally risen above the hillside. Bella could hear the call of the morning birds, could feel the earth beneath her move. The breath before her lips made just the slightest fog in the very early morning, though in all honesty she did not feel that cold. Even though the air nipped, Bella was warmer than ever. Back into the world of light, though not back for long. But she would treasure every minute, not waist a single second.

The wind ruffled her hair, and she turned back to see her house, tiny and miniscule behind the curtain of trees. After feeling a bit of sunlight through her hair, Bella decided to head back home. She walked her way through the back door. Charlie was still asleep. Closing the door so that he didn't get a chill, Bella shut all the shades, letting him sleep for however long he wanted.

Ok, ok, I know. Really short chapter. But it makes up for the long one I just gave you guys. Besides, this stuff is important.

~T.


	11. The Best Laid Plans

OMG yes... Sorry! I know, three weeks without an update D8 But so many things have been happening... where to begin? Got a new job, for one thing. Which is nice. The web comic is really taking off. Anyone who's interested in it, go ahead and look up longitudes-latitudes on deviantART. Things are going well with my boyfriend, ComiCon's coming up, I'm almost finished with my cosplay for it. Not to mention I've been working on my own books... Ah! So many things! But yes... Here we are again.

**Eleven: The Best Laid Plans**

**T**hat morning, Bella found herself making breakfast. It was oddly satisfying, frying eggs and bacon in the gentle glow of the early morning. Perhaps this was the pleasure Charlie always found in cooking? Even as a little girl, she would always remember her father waking up early to cook breakfast. Though she usually preferred sweet pancakes or waffles, Charlie always made three things for himself: Bacon, eggs, and hash browns. Every once in a while, he'd mix it up by making sausage in place of bacon, but very rarely. He was a simple man, Charlie. He liked simple things. And so, those three simple items stared up at her from the hot frying pan, sizzling and bubbling with oil beneath them. Of course, Bella had never been much of a master chief. Which was why when she tried to toss the egg from the pan to the plate, the yolk fiendishly broke all over the pretty white around it. She had to rush to get it all in a vague shape before plopping it on the plate. Ah well. The hash browns were easier. Toss a can of uncooked hash into the pan, fry it, plate it. No yolks to speak of. When the first two were done, Bella put foil on the plate to keep it hot, before making her way to the fridge for the bacon. She brought it out with a smile and set it on its own plate, happily removing the clips and opening the plastic packaging.

She froze. The smell of raw meat suddenly hit her. It was more potent than anything she'd ever encountered before. It crawled up her nose and took her by the throat. For a split second, Bella was unable to even move. Inside her mouth, saliva began to accumulate, her taste buds starting to throb. Her eyes watched as little rivers of pink began to flow from the creases of the plastic. She was unable to look away. Licking her dried lips, an immense hunger took hold of her. Her hands trembled slightly as she brought the bag of raw bacon up above her lips. Just a little taste... Just one little taste and she'd be ok. That's all she wanted. Her tongue extended, and her mouth opened. Tilting the bag, she let that luscious pink liquid drizzle into her mouth. What a taste! It excited her in a way food never had before. As she swallowed the raw, chilled juices, she found herself unable to put the packet down. Her body was fueled with the desire to consume the flesh before her. Ripping open the package without another thought, Bella grabbed a greasy, fatty strip and stuffed it into her mouth. Her taste buds were aflame with pleasure, taking in every last little morsel of meat. However, just after swallowing and getting ready to eat another, her stomach gave a painful lurch.

Sickness washed over her like a tsunami. Slamming the pack of bacon down, Bella turned and rushed into the bathroom, swinging the door shut behind her. She was barely able to get the seat up in time before vomiting violently into the toilet bowl. A horrifying splatter of recently consumed raw bacon filled the bathroom, along with Bella's coughing and sick retching. Oh what was she thinking? Raw bacon? Of course she was going to get sick! She was only thankful that her body was smarter than she was and got rid of it before it gave her e. coli. When she was finished, she flushed and put the toilet seat down, her cheek miserably resting on her arm as she watched it refill with water.

"Bella?"

She almost jumped at the sound of Charlie's voice. His face was hovering just beyond the crack of the bathroom door, eyes full of concern. Before she had time to explain, Charlie rushed to her side and put his hands on her face. He frowned. "No fever... still... Are you ok? Stomach bug?" His hand pet her frizzy hair, his face much more gaunt now that he was awake. A smile suddenly twitched on his lips. "Oh Bella..." With a shift in mood, Charlie pulled Bella into a firm embrace, clutching her tightly. "I thought I would never see you again. I can't believe you're..." He would have gone on, but his previous concern got the better of him. Pulling back, he held her shoulders. "Are you feeling ok? I was going to bring you to the hospital today anyway. So we can see if you're catching flu. Oh Bells... How... how did you even get here? What on Earth happened, Bella? After that robbery on the train... Did he hold you hostage? That's what the guys up at County have been telling me this whole time. We've actually been looking into the issue and we've got a few suspects. I know that if you looked at a line up we can get whoever did this to you. But only if you're feeling up to it, sweetpea. If you're not, go ahead and tell me now. We can wait. I'm just so glad to finally have you ba-"

Bella's hand covered Charlie's mouth, stopping his barrage of tangents. Despite her stomach still feeling queasy, she couldn't help her smile. "He took me to a place in the woods somewhere near the boarder," she explained. "I didn't have access to any phones or I would have called you. But I was able to make my way back here after I escaped. The Cullens found me just the other night. Emmett and Jasper. They were out hunting for the weekend." The pre-established alibi seemed less like a lie now that it was being used. A frown replaced her smile. "I don't want to go to a hospital... Really. Dr. Cullen gave me an exam. I'm perfectly fine, thankfully. But if you want, you can give him a call."

Charlie nodded. "I think I will. Did he check you for stomach viruses?"

Bella shifted uneasily. "Er... well no but – "

"Then I'm giving him a call later this afternoon. He'll make a house call." There was a pause. "Speaking of which, are you and Edward still together?"

What an odd question. She supposed they were, even though they were meant to end things a month ago. The best laid plans of mice and men... "Yes," she answered. "Why?"

Charlie thought for a minute, but decided that it wasn't appropriate to keep talking on the bathroom floor. Standing, he offered Bella a seat in the kitchen, got her a glass of water and insisted he finished up the cooking. He even made a bowl of oatmeal for Bella. Something easy on her stomach. After they sat down together, Charlie could barely eat, and instead used most of that time to clutch Bella's hand. Bella got the sudden feeling that he wanted to remind himself that she wasn't a dream. "Why did you ask if Edward and I were still together?"

He hesitated. "I've been thinking... This is the third time you've tried to leave Forks and something's happened. The second time you've tried leaving for good and you've been _kidnapped_..." There was a silence as Bella waited him to continue. "Bells... Look, I know this place... It isn't the most exciting town in the world. There are a lot more exciting places across the country. Across the world, really. But... I think... I think that it might be best if you don't leave Forks for a while." His eyes shifted quickly to the side before looking back to her. "I know that school means so much to you. But I can't stand the thought of..." His hand tightened on hers. "Of something happening to you again. Let alone if I'd ever see you alive again... Anyway, the reason I ask about Edward is... well, if you two were still together, maybe there'd be more reason for you to – to stay."

Bella's heart sunk within her. Oh if only they'd had this conversation three months earlier. Then again, Bella might have just been more eager to leave a father who wanted her to hold off on her dreams. So perhaps Alec would have been unavoidable either way. But listening to this speech _now_... Now when she knew the horrible future ahead of her... It cut her to the quick. But she couldn't let her father know. She couldn't even let Charlie know how she really felt, let alone the real truth. A weight of guilt doubled upon her shoulders as she forced a smile.

"Dad," she said, looking him directly in the eye. "I'm not going anywhere. More than anything, I want to be with the people I love the most. That means you and Edward both." She added a second hand to both of their's. "Don't worry, Daddy. I'm going to withdraw from the school and settle here. Where I'm safe." No matter how many times she did it, and no matter how hard it was for her, or how necessary it was, Bella would never be able to rid the dirty feeling of lying to her father.

He seemed to buy it. His eyes twinkled and his old smile returned to him. It wasn't quite as charming or warm; it had been degraded by days on end of worry and searching. But either way, it was there. Charlie stood and kissed her forehead, before pouring them both a couple glasses of milk.

After breakfast, he did indeed call Carlisle to come take a look at her, which he obliged to that evening. As expected, he backed up Bella's story without fail, and even gave her a pill bottle to take for her stomach troubles. It was, of course, just filled with placebos. They both knew that no pill could take care of her ailment. For most of the day, she and Charlie spent their time together. He even called the day off, explaining the situation to his deputies, who were more than understanding. Charlie would have spent hours obsessively cleaning the papers scattered through the house, but Bella assured him that she'd pick them up later. They were not what was important. So, taking a broom, Bella swept them all to the side for later, and let her father focus his attention on what counted. For a while, it almost seemed like old times. Thankfully, Charlie wasn't crying anymore. Instead, he and Bella watched old movies on the couch together, ate sugary snacks and even played games and told jokes. In between Bella's naps, of course. (It was strange, being nocturnal) Not since moving out of the house had Bella had a full day with her father like this. There were moments, even, when she was laughing at something Charlie had said, or simpering at _The Elephant Man_ for the five hundredth time while Charlie handed her a tissue, that it felt like she had achieved her old life back. That these tiny, precious times that she and her father shared had the power to turn back the clock. Back before vampires and werewolves and shifters. Back before monsters stalked her at every turn, licking their chops and waiting to destroy her life. Things were simply normal. And how special it was to just be normal for a change.

But that night, after Charlie ordered from their favorite takeout place and Carlisle had done his scripted check-up, Bella found herself alone in her old room. Her luggage sat at the foot of her bed, which had been cold for too many nights. Her walls were depressingly bare, a few forgotten boxes peeking out of the closet beside her naked desk. She could recall so many memories in this room. Dragging her tired body to the bed, she remembered all the nights Edward would sneak in for fun. Or some days when Jessica would pop in unexpectedly and make herself right at home. What she wouldn't give to really have those days back again. Laying along the frigid sheets, her hand mindlessly went to her stomach. She felt a faint, firm form under her skin. The pulse of blood made her hand jump from time to time. After breathing slowly, her eyes watching it move up and down, Bella tried her best to suck in her stomach. That little, petite mound would not go away. She tried again. And again. But nothing came of it. All it accomplished was wearing her out just before making her sick again. It wasn't long before she was off to the bathroom to toss up her orange chicken.

Sorry if these chapters are a little slow. I swear it gets more exciting later. This is just mood setting.

~T.


	12. Loose Ends

-bow bow bow bow bow bow bow bow bow-

I AM SO SORRY I KEEP UPDATING THESE SUPER LATE D8. I have, not only a full time job, but have just been hired as a graphic artist for WebFlow, and just got a new website for my pirate comic. Not to mention that I'm no where near where I should have been on my second novel. Please be patient! I want to write these just as much as all of you want to read them!

**Twelve: Loose Ends**

**I**t had been a week since returning to civilization. A week since she came back to the open arms of her friends and family. A week since she had smelled the sweet scent of fresh air, and let the warmth of the sun wash over her body. Her life had sprung a new light that she thought had long since snubbed out by Alec's barbarism. Yet it sparked every time she saw a familiar face, and felt those lips of hers turn up into a smile. There were times when she even forgot about the ultimate goal of this month. Times when she forgot that very soon, she would have to die. But there were other times where she could do nothing but think of what was to come. Her body made sure of that. If she wasn't waking from nightmares, she was vomiting or craving raw meats. The very scent of bloody flesh made her taste buds grow crazy with need, though thankfully she had learn to restrain it for the most part. But ultimately, whenever she was with her friends, or watching a movie with her father, she felt a sense of peace within her.

Yes, it had been a week. An entire week had passed, and she had not seen nor heard from Jacob Black.

At first, it puzzled her why he would not show up to her doorstep. Why wouldn't her best friend return to her after hearing the news that she was back? But then, after giving it a little thought, she realized that there was no need for him to check and make sure that she was alive. With the way the Blacks and the Cullens were intertwined, it was very probable that Jacob had been told what had happened from the very start. Her heart clenched when she pondered what he knew and how he was dealing with it. Which is why, while the rest of the town went about their business on a usual, Sunday afternoon, Bella found herself sitting in her beloved truck, staring at the front door of the Black home in La Push.

Her throat was dry as she mulled over what it was she wanted to say. None of this was her fault, of course. She wasn't about to apologize for being raped. But the visit between the two of them couldn't avoid the awkward tenseness that it was bound to have. The main reason, as far as Bella could fathom, was that Jacob, like Edward, blamed himself for her tragedy. She knew that he would. They had been best friends for years. She knew this was how he would think. Her head rested on the rim of the wheel, her eyes staring at her upturned feet below. She almost didn't want to see Jacob today, and for a selfish reason, no less. If she walked into that door, and saw Jacob again - in what could very well be the last time as the girl he knew and loved - she knew that the pain would be almost too much for her to bare.

What would he do? Would he try to convince her to have the thing there, on the reservation? Would he try to find another way to get rid of it? Or did he even know? Surely Billy must have known, but would he be so callous or honest that he would tell his son? Who knew if Jacob still had those feelings for her? The memories were so fresh, they left her wounded just thinking of them. Back in high school, Jacob revealed his feelings for the girl, even taking her to prom, despite the fact that he was a year younger. Remembering the pain in his eyes when he saw her dancing with Edward… She felt like a fool. She loved Jacob dearly, and yet she could not think of him as anything more than a brother, despite their history. Still, there was some part deep inside of her that wishes she _had_ loved Jacob over Edward. She began to imagine what a life with him might have been like, and his family. Thanksgivings would be too out of control to handle, but filled with warmth and love. Their fathers had probably already planned for them to fall in love the minute the two laid eyes on each other. Though Jacob was already quite filled, she imagined him as a man, and her, a proud woman beside him. What a handsome husband he'd make, if he did decide to marry. Bella flinched at the thought and lifted her head back up to look at the door. She couldn't do that. It wouldn't be fair to either parties involved, not to mention the potential wife in Jacob's future. No… This was the right choice. To drag Jacob into her twisted world now would be unimaginable. She would probably see him again, being with the Cullens. But things wouldn't be the same. There would be no care in his eyes when he looked upon her, no tenderness in his voice when he spoke her name. Those warm hands would never take hold of hers the same way again. She flexed her fingers, imagining dead flesh on bone. A man like Jacob didn't deserve a walking corpse as a bride. He was too bold, too full of life. Bella didn't deserve a man like him.

Taking one last breath, she got out of the truck and walked up to the Black's estate. Her heart thudded in her throat, and her eyes watered, but she kept her composure. She couldn't show him a teary face. She knocked on the door and waited. A few voices were heard, followed by the squeak of a wheelchair, and the heavy step of a man. After a moment more, the door cracked open. Jacob's face sat behind it. He didn't seem surprised to see her there.

"Hey," he said. She nodded, unable to speak after a moment. His hair was tangled, as though he had just rolled out of bed. However, his eyes were heavily shadowed, as though he hadn't slept at all. After glancing behind him, Jacob stepped out onto the porch, closing the door on his way out. His clothes were disheveled and his nails had dirt beneath them. Perhaps he had been running, transformed, to work off steam? He and Bella stood in front of one another, silent, countless thoughts running through their mind. Jacob casually put his hands into his pockets, turning his eyes away. A whole minute passed before a word other than "hey" was uttered. "Are you doing ok?" Jacob turned his eyes back up to Bella. The worry and gentleness behind them caught her off guard, bringing her all the closer to collapsing. But she remained firm.

"Fine," she said softly. Softer than she meant to. "I'm still alive…"

"Are you?" That question stung her, and she gripped the edge of her shirt tightly. Instantly, he seemed to regret it, though he didn't voice his apology. With a pained face, he reached out with unsure hands and brought her into a hug. It was off-setting at first, but it soon melted into that familiar embrace Bella had grown to love her entire life. Her eyes closed and she took in that rustic smell of his. Would this be the last time she could smell him like this? "I was so worried," came his voice. It rumbled from the pit of his chest, those muscles around her tightening. "Bella, when I heard about what happened… Oh God… I just about snapped."

The girl could do nothing but stand there, soaking it all in. So he did know what had happened. The full story? With the way he trembled, Bella could only assume yes. They pulled away just a bit before his big, warm hands cupped her face. To Bella's immense surprise, it had been he who succumbed to tears before she. Leaning inward, he brought her into a kiss that took her even further aback, her eyes widened slightly and her hands still up against his chest. When they broke apart, Jacob put their foreheads together. "I might never do that again," he mumbled, his eyes still closed. Though she knew that it was wrong and selfish of her to want to keep him like this, her arms wrapped around his broad chest and she gripped the back of his shirt.

"I don't want that to be the last time," she whimpered, her own eyes closing. She didn't want any of this to be the last of anything. She didn't want to taste her last meal. She didn't want to sleep her last night in her bed. Even though her feelings for the shifter were platonic, she didn't want that to be the last kiss they ever shared, either. But they both knew that once she left her human life behind, it might as well come to that. Her breath started to come in rushed chunks, her hands gripping tighter at his shirt. Out of nowhere, a thrill of fright came to her, and her legs became weak and shook horribly. It seemed so real now… the fact that she would have to die so soon.

Suddenly, her lips were taken hold of again. She kissed back this time, as though this kiss would be the one thread of memory she could keep with her when she transformed. As though if they ended their kiss, and they left each other for the day, everything would crumble, and the remaining three weeks of freedom would vanish. Soon, their bodies were flushed up against each other, their hearts slamming into one another's chest. Finally, however, their lips did part, and they were left, in each other's arms, both shaking and both crying. She would have reminded Jacob that there was still time to be together. That there were still days before she had to go away forever. But that wouldn't have helped the situation in the slightest. They both knew that a few days was not going to erase or make better the reality of this situation. In fact, they both shared the knowledge that the longer they were by each other's side, the harder it would be for her to leave.

Bella buried her face into his neck, that long, black hair falling against her head and face. She wanted to vanish in the folds of that soft, tawny skin. It felt safe there. Something she hadn't felt in a long, long time. "I'm sorry," she suddenly croaked. "I'm sorry I can't be your lover. I'm sorry I can't even really be your friend…" He silenced her with another kiss. Softer this time. Without saying a word, he told her not to be. His fingers combed through her frizzy hair, his eyelashes having clumped together from tears. After the kissing was over, they some how ended up together on the porch swing. A wave of déjà vu overcame her.

Had it been so long ago that she was a normal girl, living in Phoenix with her mother? Had it really been years that she wasn't even aware that the monsters in the closet were real? Sitting on the swing, with Jacob's arms wrapped around her, she was reminded most vividly of one of the last days she spent with her boyfriend Chris, watching as the sunset spread over the desert land. She loved Edward with all her heart, but she would give anything to have those days back. Those days of innocent youth, where all she worried over was how she would fit in at her new school. Where all that was there to cry over was the typical heartbreak of a young teen girl. If she could, she would flip a switch and get that life back in a heartbeat.

The swing chains creaked as they slowly moved back and forth. The rocking of the seat caused her eyelids to slowly drift closed. Suddenly switching from sleeping in the day time to sleeping at night left her far beyond jetlagged, and weighed heavily on her nerves for the past week. So, as the serine world around her let her breathe and take a break, her head grew heavy, and she fell fast asleep in the arms of her beloved best friend.

Bella is a sad panda. Again, I am so sorry for not updating like I should. Ugh, I've been so exhausted! I hope this is enough to tide you over for now.

~T.


	13. Saying Farewell

(Ok, FF must be having a seizure because I was sure that I uploaded this one ... twice)

Relax, this is not a dream. I have managed to write an update within a month of waiting! Blah... life... Life sucks sometimes.

**Thirteen: Saying Farewell**

**I**t almost didn't seem real. What plans she and Edward had made, that is. Waking up that morning and running through them in her head, it felt as though these were long lost thoughts from a strange dream. But as the gentle sunlight fell over her face, rousing her with its soft warmth, she knew that there was no dream, no nightmare. Tonight was the night she would have to leave Forks, never to return. As a human, anyway. Her body was sluggish as she laid there. Her hands, with minds of their own, felt along the soft sheets of her bed. Tilting her head to the side, she took in that smell. What did she smell like, anyway? She supposed that one never really knew what their own scent was like. Yet everyone else did. She tried to picture what it was people thought of when they smelled her. An odd thought, but one that passed her mind nonetheless. With her nose buried deep within the pillow, she tried her best to take in the aroma of her pillow. After a few minutes, however, she could only detect the ghost of Charlie's laundry detergent. And yet it made her smile. She would have to take a small bag of it with her, just to remind her of what her bed smelled like to her. Maybe Esme would start using it whenever she washed her sheets. Or was there a point of washing laundry? Yet another odd conundrum came to her and she stared up at the ceiling. She pictured the petite and gentle Esme suddenly putting bloodstained clothes in the washer, perhaps humming to herself and taking fresh, clean clothes out to dry. Despite the morbid day ahead of her, Bella let out a little laugh. It was strange what the mind could think up.

She brought herself to a sitting position. Her closet had been cleaned the night before. Edward had arrived at her window sill and to pick up anything she might want or need in the future. Yet she couldn't leave her room completely bare, and so a few select garments, some which she hadn't worn in years, hung behind the cracked door of her closet. She wondered what Charlie would do with them when she was gone. A small hope suddenly came to her that he would donate them. Her eyes scanned the rest of the room. She could take no real photos or momentous. Charlie was a police officer. He would notice if something of value was missing from her room after tonight. More than likely, he would skim and scan every inch of it after she was gone. Bella didn't want that. She wanted this to be believable. She wanted Charlie to accept this, and not waste a minute looking for his daughter, as much as it pained her to think this. But then she came across the one thing of great value that she would be taking with her. She had already made up an excuse to give to Charlie that afternoon, and was going to make sure he saw her take it. Getting out of bed, she approached the big thing on her dressing table and pulled it into her hands.

It was the photo album she got the first birthday she ever spent in Forks. Her eighteenth. The terrible birthday that caused Edward and his family to leave her behind. And yet it was also the birthday that set in motion her time with Jacob, and caused her to meet Mac and his gang of werewolves. A sad smile came to her face, remembering all the adventures they had that summer. She hadn't heard anything from them after they left Washington. Remembering the pack leader's unfortunate fate, she hoped more than anything that Nickey, his devoted lover, had moved on, and lead the pack with the best of his ability. One of these days, she'd have to find them again. If they were all together.

Opening the photo album, she was immediately greeted by a group shot of her friends. What lives would they lead after this? Would they remember her when she was gone? Would they care? She flipped the page, smiling softly at photo after photo. Over the past month she had taken time to work on it. Photo albums weren't exactly a common thing to have anymore, but she spent almost every night making sure that every photo she ever took with her camera was placed perfectly in the pages. All that was left were a few blank spots near the back. That would be for tonight. Her last night as Bella Swan.

Bella took her time that morning. Helped Charlie with breakfast, took a bath, read outside in the sun. She didn't miss a detail. She wanted to remember every shadow, every crack of a bug, every little gust of wind against her face. Who knew what would change – _really_ change – after tonight? But she pushed it aside for now. Now, she would focus on one thing: making tonight the best night with her friends that she ever had in her life. They would all head down to Port Angeles for the evening. Eat, shop, laugh... Anything that they wanted to do, Bella would oblige. She even let Jessica come over early on to give her the makeover she had pined to do for years. Angela had been invited as well, and the two girls were welcomed with a smile and wide open arms. Jessica, eyes bright and fingers busily opening her makeup kit, instructed Bella's every move, first insisting that she wash her hair (even though she had that morning anyway). After her hair was wet, Jessica sat her on the toilet and trimmed her frayed edges. Bella was helpless as her friend tinkered and toyed with her hair, loading it down with all sorts of products Bella wasn't even aware existed. But she let her friend do as she pleased. By the time she got a break, her hair was bound in tin foil and clips and rubber bands. She silently hoped that she wouldn't come out looking monstrous. She watched as Jessica left to grab something from her car, leaving she and Angela alone.

Bella smiled at her friend. "Do you think if I let her give me a manicure she'd orgasm?" Her smile suddenly dropped when Angela turned a sad, helpless face to her. It was almost as bad as if Angela had slapped her. For a moment, all was silent. Then, slowly, Angela stepped forward, her hands gripping together in front of her.

"Bella... What's going on?"

Those words were sharper than any fangs that ever pierced her. They struck her to the core, shaking her very foundation. She quickly brought back her smile, trying to safe face. "What do you mean?"

Angela wasn't buying it. "Ever since you came back, you've been hiding something." Her voice was soft, even for her. As she stood there, staring at Bella, looking for answers, Bella could see her friend's hands tremble. "What is it?" A silence hit the bathroom and Bella turned her eyes away, staring at the floor tile. "What do you plan to do?" In a way, she wished she could tell her. Get this burden off her shoulders. Perhaps if someone else knew, it would ease the pain.

But no. Angela was too sweet, too innocent. Angela... ever quiet, ever loyal. Always in the background, never causing trouble. Turning her head back up, she brought back her smile (a much truer one than before) and stood. They seemed to share a silent connection then. Angela knew that Bella would now never tell her the truth, and at that same time, Bella knew that Angela would always know it. Part of it anyway. Reaching forward, she brought her friend into a tight hug, closing her eyes and holding her close. Angela returned it, her hands desperately clinging to the back of Bella's shirt. Out of all the people she left behind, she hoped that Angela would have one of the best lives after this.

"Kay, so I got that – " Jessica's voice cut through the room like a lightning strike. The two friends broke the hug and turned to Jessica, who blinked at them before a little smile twitched on her face. "Did I interrupt something?" It wasn't hard to pick out the subtext from her inflection. Bella just rolled her eyes and sat back down on the toilet.

"Just finish your experiment, Dr. Frankenstein."

It took Jessica it good half hour more, but finally, she found herself finished and satisfied with her work. Standing up, Bella found that for once in her life, her hair was not frizzy. She almost didn't look like herself with such perfect, straight hair. She laughed, running her fingers through it. "Wow," she said brightly. "Why don't I let you do this more often?"

"Because you don't know what's good for you," said Jessica with a smile. "Now come on. Let's get you something to wear tonight."

Time went by like a flash, and before Bella knew it, she, Angela and Jessica had arrived at the seafood restaurant they all agreed on in Port Angeles. The guys were already there and waiting. Tyler, Eric, and Mike all sat in the lobby, waiting for their table to be called. Even before they were seated, Bella was determined to make this a memorable night. They took pictures by the fish tank, told jokes and shot the shit, as it were. Finally, they all were given a table and menus to boot. Mike let out a low whistle. "These are all really pricy... But we're all splitting, right?"

Bella smiled at them all. "I can cover it," she suggested. The others looked at her.

"Oh no, we'll all split the bill. Don't worry about it."

"Yeah, Bella. We'll pay."

"No, no, really." Bella set her menu on the table, looking at them with earnest eyes. This was going to be the last time she ever needed money. She wanted to spend every penny on something that mattered. This mattered. "I insist, guys. I have enough money left over from my college fund and I want to show you all how much I appreciate you guys." They looked at each other, surprised at her generosity. "This isn't reverse psychology. I really want to pay for all of you. And don't go ordering cheap stuff, either. Anything you want." The table was a little silent, wondering if they really should take Bella up on the deal. Finally, Mike spoke.

"Well in that case..." He made a comical gesture with his menu, making the rest of the table laugh. Her friends thanked her for her offer, and took her up on it. Since she insisted, of course. That had gotten the ball rolling to a great night. Despite everyone ordering something different, they all wound up sharing their plates. Bella managed to have at least a few bites out of every dish on the table. They spent a good two hours at that restaurant without even noticing the time fly. But eventually, the last bite was eaten, and the tab was paid. Bella put it on her card without a second thought. Debt collectors didn't call vampires anyway. Besides, all that she had left in her bank account was going to Charlie eventually. She just hoped that he'd take it.

After dinner, the group decided to hang out along the port. It was a Saturday night, so the place was still alive with all sorts of people. Above them, a few paper lanterns were strung up between buildings. Shops were open later, the sweet smells of bakeries and ice cream shops enticing them at every turn. They walked until their feet hurt, talked until their voices cracked. Bella didn't want the evening to end.

But 11:30 rolled around and she felt a weight in her stomach. The night, and the last moments she had with her friends, had come to a close. Turning and explaining that she needed to go, the others came around her for a big group hug. Bella felt herself welling up with tears, but pushed them back. Was she going to cry every time there was an emotional moment now? She squeezed back with all her might before waiving and making her way to her truck. Once inside, her hand went to her big photo album. She had just enough pictures to fill it.

She drove her way back to Forks. She didn't take the main road. Instead, she turned and headed down a narrow, swirling dirt road that not many took. She felt sick when she thought about how worried Charlie would be after this. But there was no other way. Taking a breath, she twisted and turned until her headlights came across a pale figure by the edge of the road. Edward stood on the side of a small cliff, leading down to a river bank. He would help her die tonight.

Bella drove the truck to the edge and got out, leaving it running. Grabbing her camera and album, she went to her vampire lover and greeted him with a gentle kiss. "Thank you... I got what I needed out of this month." Edward smiled softly, petting her unnaturally straight hair. It was Carlisle who had taken the risk of letting her back out, of course, Bella just felt like she needed to say those words. Edward gave her another kiss and walked to the back of her truck. As those strong, white hands gripped the metal, his fingernails piercing the dingy, red skin, Bella's insides twisted suddenly.

This truck had been with her through thick and thin while in Forks. It had been her welcome home present. Her closest companion. It wasn't fast, and it wasn't new. It guzzled gas and it had some problems with the suspension. But it was a loyal truck. Seeing it meet its own fate was cruel, almost. In her mind, she said her final goodbye as Edward pushed it over the cliff and into the watery ravine. It made the most awful noises as jolted its way down the rocky side, bumping and jumping along the uneven ground. Finally, it hit the thick river below it, splashing as it made contact. For a moment, it remained still. Then, the water slowly filled its open windows, and the machine was gradually lifted from the earthy bank and pushed deeper into the water. It wasn't long before all that was visible was the top of the cab. Edward's hand landed on her shoulder.

"Let's go home."

Home. Was that what it was now? She supposed so. Turning to Edward, she held him close around the neck, letting the cold wind brush up against her legs and arms. Edward pulled her into his own and lept upwards. A few bounds later, they vanished into the night.

Goodbye, Trucky. We'll miss you ;~;

T~


	14. For Good

Well... hm... What excuse do I have now? To make a long story short, I put up a website for my comic, went to Y-Con, got a full time job, celebrated a 6th month anniversary, and got taken over by ponies. Fuckin ponies.

Actually, to be honest, my thrill for writing these re-writes is starting to wane, as hard as it is to say. When I first started these, I had this burning desire to fix them in my own, small way. Now that I don't care as much... it's not as big of a priority anymore. But I won't stop until this is finished. I've come to far to give up. So forgive me if I'm slow, but I swear I'll finish.

**Edit: **Well this is rare. I started writing this chapter like, a month ago, and for some reason never finished o0 But I'm finishing now...

**Fourteen: For Good**

**O**ne would never expect to be a guest to one's own funeral. It was, at the very least, an interesting proposal, but perhaps never taken seriously. Sometimes it was thought of in jest. "Being late to your own funeral" and that sort of thing. And yet there Bella was, high above the Forks' cemetery in one of the pine trees, held sweetly by the vampire behind her. Her thick coat kept her warm in his cold arms as she watched the scene below. It was a dreary day for her funeral. Bella had hoped that it might have been sunny. The overcast clouds and light sprinkles were far too much of a cliché. Her heavy head rolled itself onto Edward's shoulder. In a gesture of understanding, Edward sweetly pet her hair. It did little to comfort her.

The party was bigger than she'd expected. Her parents and Phil were there. Her mother couldn't stop her on and off weeping. Bella wished she wouldn't. She shouldn't be mourned for this way. It wasn't right. It hurt to see her mother shake and cry into a tissue. But Bella forced herself to watch. This was her own punishment for a crime she did not commit. Her father barely moved. His eyes were plastered to a large, school photo Bella had taken in her sophomore year in high school. She hated that picture. Yet no one dared not look at it. Her closest friends were there as well, along with people from school whom Bella didn't even recognize. Teachers also paid tribute, some of the strangers holding candles in Bella's honor. No doubt her freak accident caused waves back in school. It wasn't every day that a student was drowned in the river, after all. Bella noticed, with a sinking stomach, that only Billy Black was present. Jacob had not shown.

Finally, the preacher paused in his sermon to let certain attendees present their eulogies. First her father, his legs stiff and his face blank, stepped up to speak. By the way he moved, he could barely get the words from his mouth. He was never good at public speaking. But Bella doubted that was the case here. Seeing Charlie fumble and shake as he stood, her resolve began to waver. Edward gently kissed her cheek.

"We don't have to be here," he said kindly. "I know this is killing you..."

Bitterness rose in her throat. "No," she said pointedly. "No... _this_ isn't killing me, Edward." A silence sat between them before Bella's sharpness softened. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be snappish."

"You have no need to apologize." He laced their fingers together. Though he was wearing gloves, Bella could feel that cold hand of his that she held. "I can only imagine what this is like for you."

Her body relaxed against his hold as she recalled his own life story. "It must have been worse for you." Edward shifted behind her. "You saw your parents die right in front of you."

This was true. Just before Carlisle found Edward, a vampire had attacked he and his family, killing his parents almost instantly. After Carlisle saved him, Edward's past experience weighed on his conscience for two decades before really coming to terms with what had happened. Edward still had no idea who it was that killed his mother and father. His forehead pressed up against her hair.

"What happened happened," he said softly. "There's not much I can do about it now. So I try not to dwell on it..." His words died in his throat. How could Bella not dwell on it? Not dwell on the child of the vampire who raped her? Not dwell on the fact that in order to save her own life, she would have to give it up intentionally? It would be a very hard thing not to dwell on indeed. Sensing her thoughts, Edward's hand slithered into her jacket and laid itself against her stomach. Over the past five months, she had grown quite a bit.

Five months. It had been five months since she left Forks. She had been pregnant for six and a half, according to Carslile. It took just five months for her family and friends to give up hope finding her. Some may have considered this to be a lack of will and love in the ones they left behind. To Bella, it was a relief. She didn't want to see her father drag himself through years and years of torment trying to find his daughter. One of those fathers who insisted that she was alive. If they hadn't set things up the way they did, he might have.

"Hey." Edward's voice brought her into reality. "Look at me." She hesitated before lifting her head to his. His thumb ran along her jaw. "I'm going to take care of you, yeah?" Their noses were pressed together. "I know it's not ideal but... I'm going to make sure that you and... and that baby have the best life imaginable."

A jaded smile came to her lips. "Unlife, you mean."

Edward took on a hurt look. He was really trying. In the beginning, he had blamed himself so much for letting what happened happen. Now, faced with nothing left to do or act upon, Edward resolved to make up for it by being at Bella's beck and call out of sheer guilt. She threaded her fingers through his hair and brought him in for a kiss, letting it linger for some time. Then, she pulled apart. "Thank you," she said softly. "Thank you, Edward." A muscle in his jaw twitched and he held her tighter. The poor boy. He cared for her so dearly. Bella wished that she could return the favor... somehow.

A surge of pain suddenly took ahold of her and she whimpered. She probably would have fallen off the tree, had Edward not braced her against him. He let her squeeze his hand as tight as she needed, his lips flat against her temple. As the pregnancy went on, the sharp pains she experienced got worse and worse. This was not a typical kicking fetus. This was her body slowly being eaten away by the demon inside her. The way Carlisle explained it, in order to feed itself, it was feeding off of the flesh around the wound. Typically, a normal genetic vampire mother would be able to resuscitate her missing walls and blood. But Bella, being a human, had no means of doing so. Hence why she needed to become a vampire in order to survive the birth.

Finally, the pain subsided, leaving Bella tired and weary. She fell limp in his arms as he cradled her close. It was all he could do to ease her. Her eyes, on their own accord opened and drifted once more to the funeral. Jessica was speaking now. She couldn't seem to get a word in without crying. With a sigh, Bella cradled her head beneath Edward's chin, letting her body relax.

"We should go," came Edward's low voice. Bella said nothing – neither for nor against the idea. But just as they were about to leave the tree, Edward hesitated and tilted his head down. Bella's eyes followed. Lowering themselves to the ground below, she saw someone and her heart leapt. It could be no one else. That shiny black hair belonged only to one other person, along with that tawny skin and strong arms. Jacob had stopped at the base of their tree, his hand resting along the bark. Bella wanted to call to him, but knew that her voice would be heard. Her hand tightened on Edward's arm. Inside, she knew, she _knew_ that Jacob knew that they were there. He could smell them. That was why he had stopped at that very tree.

_Look up_, she pleaded in her head. _Look up, Jacob. At least look at me... Please... _But Jacob remained still. Perhaps he was debating it. Perhaps he was even tempted. But as his nails dug deep into the tree bark, Bella knew it was a lost cause. He remained very still for a moment more before leaving only a claw mark behind. Bella swore to herself that she wouldn't cry. Now, however, she was starting to reconsider. Miserably, she finally tore herself from looking at the scene and wiped her face roughly with the back of her sleeves.

"Ok," she hushed. "Ok. Let's get out of here." Edward didn't need to be told twice. Cradling her in his arms (she could no longer sit on his back for obvious reasons), Edward leapt swiftly from the branch and made his way through the forest. Bella could remember a time when his running would unnerve and frighten her. Now, there was a strange peace that Bella found within his sprints. The world and wind moved so fast around her, she supposed on some philosophical level, she was not moving at all. It was strange to think about, but she had done a lot of thinking in the past few months.

Arriving at the Cullen's home, Jasper waited for them on the porch. As he swung, he let his bare feet just lightly touch the ground below, his thin hands fiddling with a doll he was whittling from wood. An old fashion pocket knife flashed beneath his skilled fingers as he made precise, quick cuts along the wooden girl. Bella could remember him telling about this skill of his. When he was a young man – a slave raised in the South – Jasper had very little to keep him happy. It was his grandfather that introduced him to woodwork. He took to it like a natural, and had been making little wooden toys ever since. His room was full of them. All shapes and sizes, too. Of course, being the shy boy that he was, he never might have shared this with Bella had he not liked her so much. His golden eyes lifted as the two of them settled on the porch, Edward putting Bella to her feet. The grayed out black boy stood and smiled, his doll in one hand, his knife in the other.

"Jasper, have you been up all day?" Edward's voice took on a big brother-ish tone. Funny that he was technically younger. "You know you need rest."

"I couldn't sleep," he admitted, the three of them heading inside. Jasper cautiously looked up to his soon to be sister-in-law. "And how's you, Miss Bella? Feelin' all right?"

She mustered up a kind smile, one hand on the top of her stomach. "Doing ok, thank you, Jasper. Is everyone else asleep?"

"Yessum."

"All right... well we best not wake anyone else up."

"You sure? Mr. Carlisle would want ta know ye're back."

"I'll tell him myself," Edward suggested. "You go escort Bella to bed. Are you hungry?" Now he addressed her.

"A little," she admitted. "What do we have still?"

"There's that left over lamb in the ice box. You want me to cook it?"

"No... leave it raw."

"Right..."

This was typical for them now. Just a normal day in the Cullen household. It had taken a little while to get to that point in time. At first, no one was really sure how to act around Bella. Everyone there handled her with such kid gloves, it nearly drove her crazy. But as the days rolled on, Bella found herself being molded more and more into the family. After all... that's what they were now, right? In a way, this strange new life was comforting to her. Even though there was the ever-present looming cloud over their heads, the family unit facade was enough to distract her.

Emmett playing the charming big brother, and Rosalie, the ever worrisome big sister-in-law. Jasper, who followed her about like an eager, young sibling, and Esme, the sweet faced and gentle hearted mother. Then there was Carlisle, the stern and firm handed father, and Alice the... strange cousin who may or may not have dead bodies somewhere in her closet. And of course, there was Edward. Perhaps it was her mind playing tricks, but he was starting to feel less like a boyfriend and more like a husband. Maybe that was because boyfriends were fickle and weak willed and frightened. Boyfriends were children who wanted to play house, until they got bored and decided to go with doctor instead. Boyfriends took girlfriends out on dates, did a bit of a mating dance by spending more than they should, all in hopes of getting to third base. Husbands, on the other hand, were much studier creatures. At least they should be. For better or for worse. In sickness and in health. Well Bella sure as hell wasn't healthy. And this clearly wasn't her better days. Only someone who really and truly cared would stick around for this.

When Edward split off down the hallway, Jasper and Bella headed upstairs towards her and Edward's room. After moving back, Bella didn't want to stay in that cold, empty guest bed. And of course, no one – not even the conservative Rosalie – said a word against it. And so, a bigger bed was made for them and Bella got herself as comfortable as possible. Whenever they had a quiet night together, they would curl up in bed and listen to some of Edward's old records. They must have heard them all by now. Bella had come to live without a computer. It wasn't easy, but she managed. Her lack of a phone was even harder to cope with, but she managed that too. By the end of the first three straight months, she didn't even miss TV. There were books to read if she wanted them, music to listen to and things to help with around the house. It wasn't exciting, and it wasn't glamorous. It just _was_.

Lighting a candle by their vanity, Bella settled herself into bed. She had once more gotten used to their nocturnal schedule. "What are you making there?" she asked before he could leave.

Jasper shrugged, looking at his creation in the dim, flickering light. "Dunno... Just a girl."

"No body in mind?"

Jasper shied away, his feet shuffling a tad. "Well... I've already made you a coupla times, Miss Bella." She smiled at that. Jasper was the sweetest boy she'd ever met. And it didn't fade with time. "O'course, I've made everyone so far. You, Mr. Carlisle, Edward, Emmett, Miss Rosalie, Ms. Esmee, Miss Alice..."

"Hm..." She stared at the doll for a moment at his tools. A strange, dark impulse came into her mind. "Can I try for a bit?" Jasper tilted his head to the side only slightly before handing her his knife and doll without question. It was heavier than she imagined. Probably thick pine or redwood. Lord knew there was enough of it out here. Bella carved a few bits off her shoulder, watching the way it shaped it.

"Jasper?" Both looked up to see Edward poke his head inside. "Do you know where that lamb went? It should be in the ice box."

"Ah..." He tapped his bottom lip before nodding. "Sure... just... I'll find it." Turning, he lead Edward from the room. Bella could hear their feet move at a regular pace down towards the bottom floor. She waited, almost as if to make sure they were gone. Setting the block of wood aside, Bella sat up and stared at her reflection in the knife.

That funeral left her with a terrible, hallow feeling. Almost as though she had no right to be breathing while so many loved ones mourned. How _dare_ she be alive as her empty coffin was put under the earth? On top of this feeling of worthlessness, Bella once more felt those sharp pains as that baby took yet another bite from the inner walls of her uterus. With a whimper, she curled forward and clutched her stomach. God, this was too much. Her face tensed and she waited it out. It was longer than usual. The more that child grew, the more and more it ate. She'd probably be thinner than Alice by the time she had this baby. She heard once that after you became a vampire, your body froze, in a sense. Would hers freeze in a perpetual state of pain?

She couldn't bare the thought. In fact, the more and more she did think about it, the more and more she began to panic. She couldn't stand the idea of living in a constant state of woe and agony. It was already worse than anything she had ever felt. Imagine if it would be until the end of time? Her hands shook as she clutched the whittling knife so tight her knuckles lost color. She wouldn't let that happen to her. She couldn't.

With a might thrust, she jutted the knife into her stomach. White hot pain shot through her entire body and she gasped, falling to her knees. If she could kill that baby... if she could kill it... she could go back to the way things were, and just forget about all that's happened. Yes... yes, what an idea! Why didn't she think of it! She felt like laughing and crying at the same time. When her hand went up to wipe her face, she saw the red oil of her blood stare back at her.

"Oh... BELLA! Oh God!" The sound of Edward's voice drew her back to reality and made her burst into tears. No, _no! _If he saved her – if he pulled her back from this madness – she could never return to her old life! She was so close to ending it, so close! Edward rushed to her and put an old shirt up to her wound. She only sobbed harder, giving no reason to her actions.

They were like that until all in the house were alerted by her cries.

All right... enough of this madness. Time to watch American Horror Story.

~T.


	15. Death's Lullaby

...Yeah. At this point I'm just doing this to finish. But I swore that I would, so I will! Plus, we haven't even gotten to the exciting stuff yet.

**Fifteen: Death's Lullaby**

"**A**nd how has your sleep been?"

"All right some nights. Others... not so much, I guess."

"Any dreams?"

"No good ones."

"And how are your impulses?"

Bella hesitated, staring at Carlisle from across the room. In all truth, he could have just read Bella's mind and gotten the answers he needed. In fact, he probably already had. But he insisted that talk-therapy was what Bella needed if she was going to have a somewhat healthy transition. After two and a half long months of talking things out, Bella didn't know if it helped or not. At least she hadn't tried to kill herself since then. Though she doubted if the Cullens would ever leave a sharp object with her again. Currently, she and the doctor sat in his office, the sounds muted around them. The thick oak doors were shut, giving them privacy to speak. However, Bella could bet that an ear had been placed at that door once or twice while she was in here. After the attempt on her own life, Carlisle had started this regiment once a night. Now, with the birth so close in sight, Carlisle had her speak to him sometimes twice or three times a night.

"Bella?" Carlisle's voice got her back to reality. "Your thoughts wandered."

She shifted, still not used to that little aspect of their therapy. Knowing when she got off track. "Sorry."

"No need to be. Just relax." Bella let out a long breath, loosening her muscles. "I know this must be a very tense day for you. With the way your body has been acting, the baby should be here any day now." Her breath caught in her throat for a moment before she let it back out. "Have you and Edward discussed it yet?"

Bella took her time in answering. "I guess you can say that."

"How so?"

A sigh escaped her lips. "We both knew that it was coming. Like you said. I can't live without dying first, right?"

Carlisle gave her a gentle smile. "Yes," he agreed. "But have you spoken to him about when?"

Subconsciously, Bella's hand went to her stomach. It was the only part of her that was full these days. Everything else was like skin vacuum wrapped around bone. Her face no longer held those plump, warm cheeks or the little pudge beneath her arms. It was all skin and bone around that tight, round stomach of hers. She could almost count every bone in her fingers. "I don't think he needs to be told when," she said quietly. "He knows, Carlisle."

Dr. Cullen gave a short nod. "Yes... He would." Edward would know. Today was the day. With the clock ticking each hour that got them closer to birth, they knew that to wait any longer was to wager Bella's life. Today would be the day that Bella died. "Has he mentioned anything to you yet? Say when you woke up?" Bella shook her head.

"He's been quiet. I don't think he has to say anything though. Neither of us do."

Carlisle set his notebook down, rubbing the bridge of his nose out of habit. "So then," he continued. "You've successfully changed your sleep patterns. So that won't be an issue for you after you turn. It's surprisingly common among newborns."

"Is that what I'm going to be?"

"That's our name for it, yes. And based on your diet for the past few months, you shouldn't have any trouble making the transition to animal blood. Though this is the hardest thing to do, especially for someone so young. When you're born, the thirst for human blood is great enough to go mad over. A very select few have the will power to make the permanent change."

"Why is that?" It occurred to Bella that she had never asked this before.

Carlisle's smile returned. "Simple biology. As you know, blood cannot stay in our veins for long. A heart which cannot pump allows the still blood to become stale. In our case, it withers and dries. Like evaporating water. The easiest and most satisfying replenishment is human blood. After all, we were all human once. It's only natural." His smile became grim. "If you can call us natural, anyway."

Bella shrugged. "It's natural enough for me. But I guess that's not a good thing, is it?"

"No, I don't suppose so." He laced his fingers together and laid them on his thigh. "And how are you emotionally? Are you scared, perhaps? Nervous?"

Bella shrugged. "After these last couple of years, there's not a lot that can scare me anymore." It was sad how much of that statement was true.

"And," Carlisle continued, "have you thought of a name?"

What a normal question. So normal, in fact, that it took Bella aback. A name? That was something mothers thought about. Something wives and expecting women thought about. Not something Bella thought about. It made her stop in her own thoughts, realizing the strange distinction she made between herself and those who wanted children. Never – not once – in her pregnancy did Bella actually think of the thing inside her as a child. Maybe it was her perpetual pain, or maybe it was the fact that she was raped. When she was younger, sure she thought about starting a family. But in that vision, Bella was married with a job and a life. This was... No, she couldn't think of this thing as a child.

Or she didn't, anyway. Starting very soon, she would have no choice.

"So then?" Again, Carlisle's voice filled the room. "Have you thought of a name? Perhaps discussed it with Edward? He will act as the father, yes?"

Now that was something. Picturing Edward as a father. Bella got a strange vision of Edward playing catch with a faceless, laughing child. Or teaching them how to ride a bicycle, or sending them to a time-out after stealing a cookie. That, she supposed, gave her a little warmth towards this birth.

"No," she admitted. "I haven't. But... I'll talk it over with him. Maybe tonight." A small, sudden spark of happiness suddenly popped into her chest. It was miniscule and vulnerable. One gust of wind and it could be blown cold by sadness. For now, however, it remained there, gently pulsating like a strong-willed little ember. "Before we go to bed, I'll talk to him."

"That's good," said Carlisle. "Edward will make a fine father."

That teeny, tiny spark of happiness got just a little bit brighter. "Yes," she agreed. "He will."

A knock caught Bella off guard. Carlisle, she supposed, wasn't. Turning his head, he called: "We're almost through. Can you wait a moment?" A shuffling was heard outside. Sighing, Carlisle turned to Bella. "It's Edward. He wanted to speak with you." Carlisle paused before turning his eyes back to the door. "Oh for goodness sake, Edward, don't be so dour. Of course Bella wants to talk to you. Come in if you're going to mope so loudly." She couldn't help the small smile on her face as the door opened.

Carefully, Edward pried the door open and shuffled inside. "Hi," he said with a slight nod.

"Hey," Bella replied.

"How's the session going?"

"Incredibly well," said Carlisle. "We've been making great progress."

"Oh..." He shifted uncomfortably. "I guess I'm sorry I interrupted."

"Don't be," Carlisle said, matter-of-factly. "You're the progress." Standing, Dr. Cullen picked up his books and pushed them under his arms. "I think that should do it for tonight, Bella. I'll leave you two to talk." Shifting his eyes to his son, the head vampire left the two lovers alone. Edward took a moment before sitting beside Bella and taking her hand.

"I thought the others were hunting tonight?"

Edward shrugged. "I'm... not very hungry." An awkward moment past. Of course he wouldn't hunt tonight. He would be getting food somewhere else. A cold finger brushed past her cheek and a sad look came to his gaze. "Bella... I'm so sorry it had to come to this."

"This isn't your fault, Edward." Leaning in, she pressed their foreheads together. "You're not the reason this happened. So... stop dwelling on it already."

His eyes closed and his brow knotted tightly. "I just wish that you could have been happy."

Bella felt a strange jerk to her stomach. One that fanned that little kernel of light to a brighter, glowing coal. "Edward... Look at me." He shifted his eyes to hers. "What happened was terrible. But there's nothing we can do now but just try to hope for the best in the future. Don't you think?"

"But if I was just _there_ I – "

Bella silenced him with a kiss. They were still as their lips connected. The life she had wanted before was gone. It was time to accept that. It was also time to make the best out of what she had. What she had was an eternity with a man who loved her. When they broke it, Bella stood and brought Edward with her. His gaze shifted to her unborn child, and he let his hand hover. Covering his hand, she pressed it to her stomach. "It's all right. You can feel." They both felt a little nudge against her wall and Bella gave a little smile. The pains had gone away recently. The way Carlisle figured it, the baby had reached its growing limit, and would not need nourishment until it was out of the womb.

"Come on," she said softly. "Let's go." Taking his hand, the two left Carlisle's office and made their way to Edward's room. The house was silent. It was true, everyone was out this night, hunting for the week. Bella had a feeling that they had chosen this particular night for a reason. Their footsteps made the floors beneath them moan slightly with every shift in weight. Her eyes, far more used to the dark now, easily found the open door to Edward's room, and the two headed inside.

As Bella made herself comfortable on the bed, Edward lit a few candles and got the room ready. _Their_ room, Bella should say. In preparation for the birth, Edward had cleared out a good section of his beloved records to make room for a crib and baby blankets. The mattress that once sat on the corner of the floorboards was now elevated by a proper wood frame. Bella's clothes now shared Edward's closet space, and a small wardrobe was sanctioned off for baby clothes. Up until now, it hadn't felt real.

The bed fell slightly as Edward sat beside her. Raising his arms, he encased her in a secure hug. His chin sat atop her head and they remained there for a while longer, listening to the gentle popping of the wax candles. But, not being able to hold off for much longer, Bella removed herself from Edward and faced him. She was ready. Nine months of preparing and going through her own personal Hell, and she was ready.

"Will it hurt?" It felt like an automatic question.

Edward smiled meekly. "Yes," he said, his voice honest. "But only for a little bit. Then it all goes numb."

Bella nodded. She hadn't expected him to say "no." "All right," she said. "I'm ready." They took each other's hands and Edward gave her one last, final kiss. Laying her down, he placed his lips along her face, and then against her jaw, and finally on her neck. Bella was nervous. A little scared, actually. But as his hand clasped hers, she knew that she was in the arms of a loved one. And so, with her blood offered to him, those two twin teeth pierced her skin, and they reached the point of no return.

It didn't hurt that much at first. Bella had been bitten before, and for a while, it didn't seem like anything special. But then, slowly, dizziness set over her. The longer Edward went, the more lightheaded she became. Her body began to twitch and her vision doubled. Her heartbeat, jumping in a strange arrhythmia, started pounding in her head. She could hear her breathing increase with each inhale, which was becoming more and more difficult. Soon, her entire body was shuddering as the life was literally being sucked from her body. She began to whimper, but did not push him away, even if she had the strength. Finally, she gasped, her eyes widening. A whole new world of pain greeted her. It was as though the insides of her body were melting of pure acid. Everything burned painfully, throbbing violently beneath her skin. Yet she could not scream. She was paralyzed, staring up at the ceiling. Helpless as her entire body shrieked in pain. It was as though Hell itself was yanking apart her organs to make room for Satan's ascension. Her vision clouded and spotted with black, and soon, she was completely blind.

And then, in an instant, it stopped. All of it. Her heart, her pain, her breathing. But she still lived. Though her lungs stopped expanding, she felt no urge to breathe. Though her heart stopped its beating, there was no panic to move. She simply _was._ In a state of perpetual stillness. And yet, she lived. More than that, she moved. Out of habit, her eyelids came down in a blink. The blindness ebbed away, giving way to sight. What a strange, strange feeling.

"Bella?" Edward's face came into view. He had changed. Still pale and handsome, yes. But beneath that chalky white skin laid thousands of miniscule blue veins. Barely visible to anyone who wasn't looking for them. Is this how a vampire saw another? Or just others in general? His eyes were bright. Insanely bright. More than that, she could see the color shift and turn. Like the face of a constantly moving clock. Slowly, she rose to a sitting position. Her body felt different, too. Light. As though she weighed nothing. Edward and Bella stared at one another, an inch away from each other's faces. And now, the test.

Raising his hand, he split his lower lip with his two fingers, spreading the skin until that rich, creamy oil started to rise. Bella stared at it, fascinated. Her mouth became suddenly dry, and she could feel her bones quake. She wanted that blood. She _needed_ that blood. Leaning forward, Bella encased Edward's lips with her own, kissing away that luscious red life. It slid down her throat like warm honey, spreading through her empty body the moment it touched her stomach. Oh... how _wonderful!_ It was as though every fantastic meal she had ever eaten as human meant nothing. The sweet, salty taste of his blood was enough to sway her into a euphoric, lucid state of being. She felt, almost, like a drug addict.

But then, Edward pulled away, his mouth pink from the mixing of blood. Hers was also, she could only assume. Edward's thumb ran beneath her lip, wiping up the dribble from her mouth. Bella saw a strange look in his eyes. No... not strange. She knew that look, and knew it well. But it had been so long since she saw it. She used to see that look every time Edward snuck into her room at night. Every time he crawled into bed with her, trying to stifle her giggling. Every time she opened her apartment window and let their secret weekend begin.

Bella had not had sex in nine months. She had been afraid to, honestly. And with Edward dripping in guilt, it was no mystery that he had been, too. But now, sitting there, with blood between their lips, Bella could feel that urge rise up in her. Forget Alex. He would not win. She wouldn't let him win. As her thin arms clasped around his neck, she made a note that her sadness and woe had been a winning point for that bastard. Well she would not be miserable any more. No. His sins would not rule over her life a second longer. They fell to the bed, sharing another burning kiss. Perhaps her becoming a vampire meant losing fear as well. Because as Edward began to lavish her, she felt limitless.

Alec had burnt her. He had hurt her. But he hadn't killed her. She had been asleep – hiding – for nine long months. And with every sway and throw of the man she loved above her, Bella felt herself waking up to a new reality.

Hers.

Yesssssss, things are starting to get exciting again. Curse my need for pacing! The birth is coming up in the next chapter.

~T.


	16. A Rose's Thorn

Yeah, I have no excuse. But I will still finish this goddamn story if it's the last thing I do.

**Sixteen: A Rose's Thorn**

**B**ella awoke, as she had for the past few months, to the feeling of darkness. It had been early morning that she and Edward finally fell into a deep, restful sleep. One that both of them highly deserved. Bella, thankfully, was devoid of nightmares. Though that made her wonder: did vampires even dream? Edward showed no sign of it, thinking back to their mornings together. Oh well. One less thing to weigh her down. Turning, she saw the profile of her... well, perhaps it _would_ be easier to just label him as her husband. After all, they were having a baby.

Yes... _They_ were having a baby. A child.

Perhaps it was Carlisle's little spark of insight that brought her to this conclusion. As if those simple questions were enough to find the happiness she had lost in those dark days. This child might have been conceived through rape by another man, but Edward would be its father, and Bella its mother. They would be a family, and raise it together. It would not be a product of the thing that sired it, she decided. If this was the life she was given, then she would damn well live it the way she wanted to.

Edward's lashes twitched as the vampire beside him began to stir. His pale lips moved as his eyes fluttered open. The two caught sight of each other and smiled. Reaching out, his arms wrapped securely around Bella's waist, bringing her in close (though with an obvious block around her mid-section keeping them apart). "Good morning."

"Good evening," Bella corrected with a smile. They were still naked from that morning. That might have been part of her depression. Alec's rape had caused her to lose herself so thoroughly that she had forgotten what it was like to feel true love. Edward wasted no time in reminding her. After a shared kiss, Edward propped his head in his hand, his other fondly stroking her belly.

"You feeling ok?"

"Ok enough, I guess."

"Good. It's going to be one hell of a transition for you, but I'll be with you every step of the way. Alright?"

That made Bella's smile stretch further. "I know." Their fingers intertwined and the two of them cuddled up close for a good hour or two. But finally, they were drawn from bed and dressed for the evening. Esme had been kind enough to make some fitting clothes for her in the later stages of her maternity. Bella had yet to thank her. She should do that. Hand in hand, the couple walked out to the living room (oh the irony) and spied the Cullen family all loitering around it already. All eyes went to Bella in question. Her smile answered it with ease. Emmett was the first one to speak.

"See, what I tell you guys? Our little Bell's a trouper, ain'tchya, kiddo?" The ex-boxer came over and ruffled her hair. "Say, you look mighty fine as one of us, kid. Though those eyes are a little dark. What, your hubby not taking care of you? Want me to slap him around a bit?" Edward huffed at his brother, his hand on Bella's shoulder. But all Emmett's little speech did was make Bella laugh outright before hugging the muscle head tight around the chest. That, if anything, loosened up the atmosphere.

Bella was helped to the couch by Esme, where Rosalie and Jasper already sat. Across from them, Carlisle and Alice watched with concerned eyes (well, more curious on Alice's part). "You're not feeling light headed?" the good doctor asked. "Nauseous? Dizzy?"

"Nope," Bella answered, her hand still in Edward's. "Actually, I feel pretty good, considering." Being undead didn't seem like such a bad prospect after all. "It's weird though. It kinda feels like I'm lighter than before."

"That happens," Carlisle nodded. "From now on, all of your senses will be different, your sense of smell most importantly. But reality itself has changed for you. What you considered heavy or fast as a human is of no consequence now that you're a vampire. Lifting a tree or a car will be like lifting a book for you."

"But you must be careful not to exhaust yourself," Esme butt in. "As much power as you have now, it can be expended very quickly. I believe Edward told you about our temperatures...?"

"Hot on the inside, cold on the outside." _Most of the time_, Bella added pervertedly in her head. "And I think all I have now is spit and sweat, right?"

"And blood, of course," Rosalie added.

"Your internal organs, except your womb for obvious reasons, have dried up. As of this point, the only reason they're still there is to fill space in your skin."

"But that doesn't mean they're not important." Emmett now decided to get back into the conversation. "We got blood in our veins to keep us going, and the organs are still part of those veins. Any real damage to 'em and that's a KO. So remember that, kid."

That surprised Bella. "So it's not just the heart?"

A grim chuckle was drawn out from Alice. "Hunters only go for the heart because it's profound," she said dryly. "And there will be hunters. Especially if word gets out that you've got a genetic baby on your teet-"

That earned Alice a scornful look from a few of the others, but Bella wasn't as affronted as she might have been. After learning Alice's story, she and her were on better terms. Besides, she'd dealt with hunters before. Compared to the Volturi, they were a cake walk. "Don't you worry about them," Emmett continued. "We'll keep you and that baby safe as can be, kiddo."

"However," Carlisle this time, "we may have to leave after the birth. I have spoken to the Blacks, and they will call for us if needed. But Alice is right. Because of how rare as this baby is, if word gets out that it exists, every hunter and nomad within a hundred miles is going to want to either kill it or keep it for themselves. There's a small group of allies up in Yellowknife that can give us a place to live for a while. Besides, Canadian weather will probably agree with you more now."

Bella nodded in agreement. The sooner she could leave this tragedy behind her, the better. The conversation was derailed when she felt Jasper scoot closer to her. "Um... Miss Bella?" His big eyes were inquisitive. "Think I can hear it?"

The question was so sweet and innocent, she could do nothing but agree to such a request. Leaning down, he placed his ear just below her breast, listening to the moving child inside her. He smiled and rose, face glowing. "I think it's gonna be a girl!" he proclaimed brightly.

"What makes you say that?"

"Cause Momma used to tell me 'bout babies," he said plainly. "She said that if it's a boy, it'll be right side up, ready to hit the ground runnin. But if it's a girl, it'll be upside down, ready to smile up at the world." Laughing as if she had no care in the world, Bella brought Jasper in for a tight, sisterly hug.

"Oh, that reminds me!" Esme stood and left the room, returning with a flat, brown box tied with twine. "I meant to give this to you after the birth, but now seems as good a time as ever. I know it's a bit old, but I've always dreamed of passing this down to my daughter, if I had one. I tried to fix it up as best I could." Bella undid the twine and opened the lid, staring at the thing below her. It was a soft, mink made baby blanket, warn and yellowed by time, but with very recent new frills sewn along the side, and patches and stitches to fix holes and rips. "It was mine when I was a child. My mother's before me. I had intended to use it on my own child but... well..." Her smile was as kind as any true mother's, and made Bella feel warm inside. "I've had it for God knows how long. It's time it got some use again."

Bella brought the blanket to her face. It smelled of generations before her. Each time she took in the scent, a new story came to mind. It was as if Esme was giving her a part of her life. Looking up, she kept it to her heart. "Thank you," she said sincerely. "Thank you, everybody. Really. I don't think I would have made it without you all." As if to add to the point, Edward squeezed her hand, snuggling up closer to her.

"Ah hell," said Emmett, swatting her thanks aside. "I have more trouble dealing with Rosie when she's in a bad mood." One of which she might quickly get into, judging by the glare she was giving Emmett right about then.

"Taking care of you is no trouble at all," Esme assured her. "Besides, even if it was, that's what family is for, isn't it?"

This tender, loving moment would have been absolutely perfect if not for one thing. As Bella relished in her slowly growing, new found happiness, she felt a tug in her stomach. At first, she thought it was one of her normal pains, but this was different. Much different. Gasping, she clutched her stomach, making the rest of the Cullens go on high alert. Before she knew it, hot liquid came cascading down from her dress to the floor. Liquid, she realized, that was vividly red and potent to all of them there. Blood acting as amniotic fluid from her womb. That could only mean one thing: the baby was ready.

Quickly, the Cullens acted. Bella was escorted back to her room, where things were cleared away and she was set along the bed. The pain she first experienced only grew worse, and in tighter, stricter contractions. Perching her against the pillows with her feet up, Carlisle began to get to work, while Esme and Edward went about comforting her in any way possible. While Edward spoke to her and held her hand, Esme used her powers to dull the pain as much as possible. But even a dark gift could not quell the pain of a genetic vampire birth. And if this was what she felt under Esme's influence, she couldn't possibly imagine what it was like on its own.

These pains went on for a few hours. Then, they only got worse. Bella's body grew hotter than the sun, and she sweated profusely to try and keep it cool. Her hair matted all around her head, and her new found fangs flashed and snared with each painful push of her body. At six hours in, she had started to scream. It was the only way to give release to herself. She was so focused on the pain that everything else around her was nothing more than a blur. The movement of the others, the voices, even the comforting words were lost to her as she tried to push out this thing inside her. Carlisle had to repeat himself quite a few times until she was able to actually hear her instructions. Breathe slower. Don't push yet. Now push. Push hard. Now calm down. Take a breath. Try pushing again. This went on for several hours more. By this time, she wouldn't have been surprised if Edward's hand was crushed to pieces. But if it was, he never complained, and never left her side. Through the hours of her screams, and her pain, he was right there beside her, kissing her sweaty forehead and wiping it clean. More hours proceeded. Even _worse_ pain, if that was possible, tore through her body like thorns. She screamed so much her throat tore, and then she screamed again. Her back went rigid, and her fingernails actually tore holes into the bed.

"Ok, ok! We're almost there, Bella! Keep breathing, keep breathing... Now, take a big breath, stay with me now, and _push!_" Bella pushed. With all her might. The push turned into yet another scream. She could feel it moving from her stomach, down her body, and towards her legs. "One more time! Take a breath and push!" Again, she pushed. The instruction was given to her again and again and again. Her body felt as though it was being ripped in half on the inside. If she had known it would have been this painful, she might as well have just killed herself when she had the chance. "One last time! It's almost out, Bella! One... two... _three! Push!_"

And just like that, the pain was gone. A wave of relief washed over her as she completely fell limp against the bed. It was over. It was finally over.

The caterwauling of the newborn caught Bella's attention. Lifting her eyes, she saw Carlisle pull up something squishy and red. Esme helped clean it off as he cut the umbilical chord. Edward, his hand still in hers, smiled against her face as they stared at it. "Look, Bella... you did so good." He kissed her tired cheek. Bella watched her baby being taken from her to the desk, which Rosalie quickly cleared for him. By the door, the rest of the Cullens were slowly peaking through the door frame, waiting for permission to step inside. As Carlisle cleaned it, Rosalie shooed them away before joining them and closing the door behind her. Bella laughed softly to herself, grateful for Rosalie's propriety.

When Carlisle came back, he held with him a slightly less reddish, but still very squished, creature in his arms, wrapped up in a towel. Slowly, he brought it over to her as Bella was being propped up on the pillows by Edward and Esme. The child was first laid in Edward's arms. "It's a girl," he announced.

Edward smiled at it. Or rather, her. "A girl," he repeated. He turned to Bella. "It's a girl. We have a baby girl."

That look of joy in his eyes brought a warm smile to Bella's tired face. A girl. Their daughter. A girl to raise and play with and teach. No longer was this baby some reminder of a far gone nightmare. Now, flesh and blood and in her father's arms – her _real_ father – this baby was material, and very much real. Slowly. Edward placed her in Bella's arms. She was as light as a feather as she rested against her mother's breast. Bald and pink, her face still smooshed together charmingly. The tiniest hand opened and closed above the hem of her towel wrap, as though she was testing it out. And then, her eyes. Her eyes opened slowly at first, but then all the way, looking up to her mother. All the warmth Bella felt suddenly was sucked away from her.

Red. The child was born with red eyes. Red as the blood she would soon make her diet. Red as the beast that gave her life. They were Alec's eyes. Her resolve to love this child suddenly were blown away, as if a strong wind had taken them from her. Alec's eyes. Her rapist was staring at her from the mask of an innocent babe.

"Bella?" Edward's soft voice tore her from the child to look at him. His fingers gently stroked her cheek. "Are you all right? Do you want me to take her for a bit?" The concern was clear on his face. Clearly, he saw the exact same thing she did. Taking a moment to pause, she turned back to the child. Those red orbs had not looked away from her, fascinated by the woman who gave her birth. Bella forced herself to see passed those eyes and instead touched her nose. That made the baby twitch and close them again. Her worries were calmed. For now.

"They're not that bad, are they?" she asked suddenly. Again, she turned to Edward. "Kind of like... a couple of cherries. Don't you think?"

There was a moment of silence. After which, Edward forced a smile and then laid a kiss in between Bella's brow. "Right. Cherries."

"Ahem?" They all turned to see the door slowly creak open, and a slew of gold eyes glowing from the shadow of it. "Um... mind if we...?" Despite her insistence to give them privacy, Rosalie was the one who seemed most curious about the baby.

Nodding, Bella allowed them in. The remaining four Cullens clamored around the bedside, peeking at the new born child. Even Alice took a speck of interest in seeing the girl. Jasper, who had no doubt heard the conversation from earlier, poked his head up with a grin. "Toldjya it'd be a girl!" he said proudly.

"She looks healthy," Emmett said with a nod. "And just as good lookin' as her momma. So, what are you gonna name her, Bells?"

Another name question. Bella and Edward looked at one another. Despite her intentions to talk about a name the morning before, it never exactly came up. Bella's eyes went from Edward to Rosalie and paused. The story Rosalie told her in her darkest time. That moment between them that they had both shared was something Bella held dear to her. Rosalie had opened up to her that day in hopes that Bella would understand that she wasn't alone. And that was right. She wasn't alone. She never had been.

"Rosemary." The name came out naturally. It seemed to fit her just right, but she turned to Edward just in case. "Rosemary's her name. Yeah?"

Edward beamed. "Rosemary it is."

"Might fine name, Miss Bella."

"It's a beautiful name!"

"Wait, so we'll have two Rosies? Won't that get confusing?"

"Oh shush. For the record, only _you_ call me Rosie."

The chatter went on like that for some time. That is, until Esme decided that the new parents needed time alone with their baby. She ushered them out of the room and closed the door. By now, it was probably well into the daylight hours. But as tired as she was, she didn't feel the need to sleep just yet. With Edward's arms around her, the small family stared at this new life brought into the world in awe. Leaning in, Bella kissed her bald head.

"Welcome to the family, Rosemary Cullen."

Yup, I just changed the name. Why? Because a combination of "Renee" and "Esme" into "Renesme," is quite possibly the dumbest baby name I've ever heard of. And I've heard a girl talk about "Precious Diamond" as a potential baby name. This way, there's meaning behind it and it's an actual fucking name. Now, I'm gonna go heal my sunburn and pass out. I'll try to update again soon, but no promises.

~T.


End file.
